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Broken Heart - Breaking Up Have you had your heart broken? Are going through a break up, divorce? Come on by & share with us, we are here to help.

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Old 03-15-2008, 04:43 AM   #1
babebabe
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Default Long distance breakup ... any help is nice!

Hi everybody nice to meet you, im having some long distance trouble in my super fab. 5 year relationship could use some advice.


I have been in a long distance relationship for 5 years we met on ICQ and after 8 mths of chat he flew me to him he paid most of the flights I did very few over the years he was always real catering to me regarding money and the flights. I also lived in canada for a year with him i left everything to show him this is what i want but while there hes so kind and loving he was taking care of most the bills in return for my sacrafice.In return he has come to the usa but not as long due to work we just flew back and forth a lot. He is my dream guy and i guess i have blown it! I have sacraficed he is in Canada me n USA for us to make this work he has too and i see that hes been loyal and dedicated to this, at one point i even lost my job and he paid a lot of my bills till I was on my feet.When i try to give him money back he never takes it but i try to show him in return the gratitude in as many ways i hope he needs.I am 26 he is 28. And we had plans of getting his visa in this next year and him moving here so that we may carry on, but we never set final plans yet. I want you to know no im not a gold digger lol at all!! we were very close about how we shared things. Also we are built upon honesty, well trust ( now i guess needs work), love, understanding , patiance, and loads of real sacrafice for each other.

THe last year has been hard and we havent had a visit because of the money issue ( this is mostly due to our college expenses we are graduates now) but I got a job and am on my feet so had plans to see him this april. Unfortantly I did something so stupid and immature i am just beating myself up over it, but i accused him of being gay because he is jsut a sensitive guy and I was just caught up in the moment of my mothers story that day about how she married am na once and found out he was really gay after 6 years. She told me to make sure he wasnt since he is such a sensitive guy well stupid me, it wasnt right of me to do must of hurt. well he left me immediately after that. Over the past weeks I have tried so so hard to get him to see that I will work on myself which i have actually a lot i woke up to some things that i could be doing better and our communication skills and my insecurity ( im a pretty strong confident woman i dont typically do something this insecure.. i just really missed my man physically i believe and the insecurity was fed by my mothers advice) I will show him through actions that I want this..but i know he has to want it to...

I sent him a letter a good 3 of them, he will not msg me via chat, i have to msg him first and hes slow to respond to me and it cant be about the topic cause if u bring it up he flips out and says look we broke up deal with it that hes not gonna put up with a woman doing that to him. I have told him i understand his shoes, that it was highly immature that I am more than willing to make this work. He is not budgeing at all. The weird thing is he keeps me on his chat and doesnt seem to block me though, but i dunno could be that he is being polite who knows. I also asked him to talk on the phone with me and he will not. he says he doesnt want to bring it up again.

I cant believe i lost this man although i believe his loss to im a good woman just had a mess up... he is wonderful... he has a lot going for him and we really compliment each other and he is the man id love to marry if we see fit if we could get this worked out and i could regain his trust and maybe a little premartial counseling. I am just beating myself up here over this he wont talk to me he wont try nothing i think i have to give up... buti ts like I want to fight im to the point id fly out there just to get this worked out but im not sure if hed jsut kick me out... I have asked him how he feels he says he loves me but hes hurt. Sometimes on the chat ill send him a little hug person and he wont send anything back bad sign. some advice would be great do you think there is any chance he will want to talk again and at least try to work on it with me? I am now on no contact with him and respecting him but for about 1 week i sorta was acting needy but i realized it pushes people further so im on the no contact rules, but i can fly out there in april im not sure if i do that or not? I dont want to make the wrong moves but i want to show with action that i am not that type of lady to come off that way. What to do at this point? I know you cant force someone to love and care for you i realize that, and i dont want that i want faith to lead us right, but i do believe making right moves over wrong can help. Is he just never going to come back, i mean even talk it out? Also i wonder if he really had some other reseintment issues he didnt talk about.. and he was looking for a way to cop out of the relationship so he put this on me ... although yes its wrong what i said but... i dont think break up was neccessary.. LD is hard and he knows that and i believe sometimes a little insecurity happens unsure if this is a cop out .. like maybe hes tired of the distance etc.. could be a cop out? maybe he wants to see the other side of the grass, because i did this he might feel the grass is gonna be greener? wow... u think? i mean i sure have sacraficed a lot im pretty green i just came off wrong, not saying ive been perfect the whole relationship but neither has he, but we have been pretty healthy, i feel sure a local girl would be a lot of fun and easy convience.. but not what i did!! and maybe he feels he has spent to much money... but i dont get that either cause well im working now its not how it was and im always willing to give you money that U WONT TAKE.

Some tell me fight for your man go out there and show him who you are others say no wait for him to call you or just let him go... so BLAH its not that i dont know what my gut tells me..cause if u ask my gut id say go out there, and show this man face to face how much u love him. its just the fact of being scared to make wrong moves its all so much chance and risk but im willing to do the best of the options. in the end i deserve happiness and he does too hes a good person i love him enough to leth im go if i must, i prefer to try harder! Im in pain that hes in pain and he has every right, but to break up!! really. im a fighter when the love is this true. i love him and love shouldnt have done what i did on another note, he broke up and walked away like it was nothing and didnt just communicate about it further im thinking he feels well you didnt care what you said to me so why should i care, would u say he is just being stubborn?... that hurts me that hed break up so easy, and not talk this out we are so much better than that we have had a good strong foundation. And i tell you what, i need to watch what i say to people, and i knew that i have no justifications. But he acts like ive never forgiven him for things.. i feel in a relationship there are a lot of mistakes people make but the test is do u give up that easy.. or work it out?? ugh im shocked by him and i dont feel any closure here.any help pls thanks.

Last edited by babebabe; 03-15-2008 at 05:44 AM.
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Old 03-15-2008, 08:26 AM   #2
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Very hard to know what's really going on between two people. But from what you are saying - you seem to have had a loving relationship for quite some time. And that's worth investing in. So yes fight for him or you will regret it. Tell him you want to carry on. And yes, fly out there. If he kicks you out and doesn't welcome you then you will know he just doesn't feel the same. But I am not sure what else you can do to get him back. The constant exchange via phone/mails/chat.... eventually you can't see his face and look into his eyes. And it sounds like that is well overdue.
And hassling him from a far - yes I think that can push him further away.

I hope there is not more to it his end. To break up that easily with you after a lover's quarrel..But again that's hard to know unless you see him and too much debating without actually seeing him doesn't sound good to me at stage.
You need to see him.

And you can' have closure after all this years unless you can see his face. This is/was a serious relationship. You need to end it face to face if the end it is - not in cyberspace. There is a real world out there, that's where we live.

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Old 03-15-2008, 05:19 PM   #3
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i agree with mashmac and maybe its because im a romantic or maybe its because i can see that you two really care and love each other and have sacrificed so much for your love that i dont want to see it go to waste over a mistake you made. tell him the story about your mom, tell him you were just caught up in the moment, that you couldnt believe you woudl have such a good guy and yuou began to doubt, which was a mistake, just keep saying that you know what you did wrong, you are so sorry, you dont know what came over you, whatever is true for your situation.

i think you shoudl fly out there so he will know how much he means to you and how much you want this to work... if he kicks you out at least you can know that you tried everythign in your power... and if he doesnt it will totally be worth everything you sacrificed to go there, from what it sound slike how much you love him.
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Old 03-16-2008, 08:47 PM   #4
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well thanks for the words.... its not looking to up right now though. he hasnt been online in about 3 days.. but im def respecting his space i just leave hi mbe its hard but yeah. But i had to call him to verify the address of some hotels im looking at cause i cant remember whtas near him as far as hotels but i didnt hint at anything just a quick 5 min call. and he answered and told me he asked why but i didnt say anything but i said do u want to talk later about it all.. just trying to see if i can get him to open up about it.. and he said sure. I asked him how he was he said hes good, i said well im ok can be better im sure but im good, and he said why whats wrong "concerned sounding" i said no no just im sure u know what it is. I said are u really sure i can call dont want to bother u if this isnt what u want and he said sure u can. So i call later that night there was no set time and his friend this guy i know picks up HIS cell phone, and says hes sleep its sorta like either he handed that to him " avoidance" or he really was sleep just weird it was like 8pm i know he has a cough and cold but weird. well of course didnt cal lback. blah Anyways were basically not communicating at all and he seems pretty set on its over, its not looking high hopeful here. I mean if he really wanted me wouldnt he try harder, but then again not if hes really hurt over this im just not sure of it all. I still want to go out there if this breakup is truly my fault but it may only be chaseing if there are tons of other little reasons i dont know and he sees it as too needy. Im nervous about what to do.. but i know one thing is for sure this is a man that really fills my soul and this breakup is only a wake up to what i really want and should of been better towards! hope its not one of those little to late... seems it so far!

Also i want to mention a long time ago prob years ago he told me dont ever accuse him of things " like this gay thing", and there here i go and he said that he said if i started doing that he would leave me cause he doesnt put up with that bull... i guess i didnt listen or consider that well jsut years ago though. He is one of those man of his word though and to bad type person if u break them. So i think hes trying t ofollow through with that word he made cause hes a true man of his word type for sure. Im more than willing to take the blame for this break up.. and i dont like that hes hurt at all AT ALL!!! in any way.. cause i do feel he is.. one thing he said to me when we broke up was i love u ... but im hurt like no other tomorrow. Hes a real sensitive person im sure he has cried over this, and i have seen him cry for things.Im going out there im just battleing it within myself.. but i have to for the sake of following my heart... and if it doesnt work to hear his ill be ok and im happy will be a wonderful satisfaction, this is my best friend family and love right here in one! I plan on being at a hotel about 10 min from him.. and texting his cell with how does coffee sound come down the road ( he knows the spot) and with me im bringing the rest of our journal, he finished one half and i was suppose to finish the other half on our anniversary and send it back... but since this happened we missed that day. I will be holding that with me its a collection of poems we wrote to each other and pics of our journey. its extremly romantic and sweet. So i hope hell show up and talk with me all night!!!!!!!!! im praying guys... but more so for his happiness.

U know guys u hurt there masculinity its devastating to them.. i hit that nerve. and to be honest im proud of him damnit, if someone is mistreating u in accusations u leave. if i were his mom id say cut her for that.. he was doing a lot for me and i had no right to say that.


BY THE WAY I LOVE THIS MAN!!!! DID I MENTION I LOVE HIM !!! IF HE GOT BURNED TODAY AND HAD NO FACE GUESS WHAT I STILL LOVE HIM!! HES THE ONE!! I KNOW IT I KNOW IT!!.. AND IF HE DOESNT SEE THAT.. HES STILL THE ONE IN MY EYES!MAN IS THAT GREAT OR WHAT

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Old 03-16-2008, 08:57 PM   #5
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If you really want him and love him - you should tell him. You are both old enough to discuss this. Just tell him you really care about him and that you would like to know if there is still a chance you might get back together. No point speculating and wondering if he will think you are desperate, how to get him back etc. Cause if he has feelings for you still, he won't mind. You are not teenagers. Or else you are setting yourself up for emotional torture, second guessing what he wants.
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Old 03-16-2008, 10:04 PM   #6
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I have to agree with what was said before me. I think you 2 need to talk face to face, so I believe that you should still go out there. You 2 have been together for too long of a time for him to just break up over an argument.

See if there is something more to it than just the argument.

Also, WELCOME to ATLF! I'm glad that you came to us in your time of needing advice.
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Old 03-16-2008, 11:05 PM   #7
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thanks mashmac i mean if hes not communicating there isnt much i can do there, hes not willing to talk which shows me a lot of where he stands u know he seems pretty set on its over so i may have to swing with that.so i just have to let him have his space he may not want this at all and to scared to show face about it and talk like a man.. i mean ur friend picks up ur phone geesh but then when im up there i hope hell meet me for the coffee but it just stinks i gotta go all the way out there spend all this money just to get him to talk that is silly, but im willing to do that and id like to see him anyways well overdue. ill let u guys up on the deal when i get back... .. so from now to april... im just sitting on the no contact, i hope the space shows him if he misses me or not, in the mean time im not going to pout to bad... i plan on concentrating on my career and fitness and other things its all u can do is continue on.

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Old 03-17-2008, 10:56 AM   #8
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we have made contact, although its very slow it is a " masculinity issue for sure" he is upset that i would just throw something like that at him after 5 years. his feeling is no man would put up with that and hes not gonna be the doormat for it. I only could agree with him on that and i told him just how wrong i am for what i did and i have no intentions of this again for i see how special he is and the world he means to me. he is still real hurt and this is goign to take time and a slow process above all things but then again we both have been wounded in a very serious relationship were we loved fully. So its only understandable. he cannot be with me right now becuase he is to hurt to deal with it.. I told him how devastating it is to just walk away instead of talking it out that " this would scare me for the future" he said he was and is so hurt he couldnt deal with even talking about it. i asked him if we are going to build a bridge? he said we already have he kept me on his chat list, and he said im lucky he didnt just never speak again even on a chat. i said are u ever going to forgive me? he said we shall see.. i asked him what can i do to rebuild this? he didnt answer... i said no more.. he was acting to choked up and not saying anymore so i said my good nites just hard talking to a wall. Its a start.. although he is saying we are not a couple in which i would of prefer him saying lets take a break and im still shocked hed walk away. and i dont know what to take of that. which still really hurts of course and he is still not communicating properly, i was in the wrong here to his eyes esp, and he is battleing in himself the forgiveness if he can even do it only shows that he does love at least enough to think about if he can forgive. Im going to stick it out and show him that we can do this.. I hope that some nurturing and time can help heal his wounds and mine and we can see about something later closer again.. if not maybe closer than before for going through such a rough time.. I pray we can rebuild this. My only fear, is how he walks away and leaves me like that... no break no space just well thats it. also my other concern is he is not willing to talk on the phone, this was done via chat.. and talking to him is pulling teeth..I mean he is saying we can build this bridge but i get no feedback? what is ur intake on all that?

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Old 03-17-2008, 11:50 AM   #9
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Don't push him. Take baby steps to rebuild his trust. We all have been guilty at one point of life or another to say silly things in the heat of the moment and over time I am sure he will learn to atleast forgive you. If his willing to talk it is a good thing. Maybe he didn't know how to answer how you can rebuild that bridge because only time can do that? As the saying goes actions speak louder then words and if you can show him that you are honestly sorry for what you said and will not repeat the mistake then time will heal all wounds.
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Old 03-17-2008, 07:54 PM   #10
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Unfortunately it does sound as if he has real envy to work on this now. So yes, leave him the space and that you have to do because he hasn't left you another choice. Perhaps just tell him again that you do care very much and would like to visit. If for nothing else than to see him face to face cause it's hurting you too much to not see him in person and talk about this. And because you want to apologize in person. So he can see how sorry you are. Can you perhaps email him? He has more time to absorb it. And you to write something thoughtful.


I am sorry babebabe - I am sure you are hurting very much. I wish there was something to protect us from the pain we feel when we love and the one we love hurts us. It can be devastating pain. But there is one thing worst than that: never to have felt love like that at all. Love makes us so happy when it's fine and right. Don't think anything else inspires us so much.
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Old 03-26-2008, 02:33 AM   #11
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well turns out hes just very STUBBORN and BLIND ....

I never flew out there... because as days went on this happened...

i had to block and delete him off my messenger cause it was causing me more pain he wouldnt msg me unless i msged him and it had tobe off topic.. dunno why he kept me on that list friends or guilt or dunno but it was makeing me feel so guilty for that stupid comment at first i felt bad that i said that comment to him i was going awe my baby i feel so bad in my heart crying for HIM! but then i was like if u know i love u which he admits he knows that i do and he knows im willing to do whatever it takes even wait for him to heal then it cant be that bad ( and i dont deserve the guilt he is the one that took it to far) i already apologized enough i mean heck i said i would fly what more do you want. I also have forgiven him before for things he said i didnt do this to him geez. It really isnt about... some stupid comment to me although ill never really know whats under this comment but to me... its the fact that I DIDNT listen to HIS warning about comments like that like YEARS AGO " and hes "boss" i guess. so he was prob trying to make me feel guilty and take the blame and go on my knees to him crying over it prob wanted me to fly out there. And i dont think he wanted to end it.. really.. i think he was trying to make me crawl around on it..and make me feel the pain by keeping me on the list and stuff who knows.After i delete and block him, i call him to tell him hey im just taking u off, ur not even trying here. And let me tell you, you can tell im pretty in pain. i say hey and the first thing he says is Im extremly upset.. i said ur upset cause i hurt ur pride and masculinity ego .. well how about im in pain cause u left me after 5 years for something this stupid. i said u know i love u u know that i care bout you right.. he says i know that you do i know. i said and you know i was willing to fly he just kept saying i know u would do that for me. i said well if u know all this then that comment shouldnt mean anything.. so there is either something under this or ur just being a stubborn mule and ur blind. Then i said well i tried u know i have been trying so hard to get you to wake up and see that i love u very much and ur not moving. And he says i know ur trying. so i just said well and u still dont want more with me.. and all he could say was well i warned u not to do that. i was like geez in my head. So i just said well bye, he said have a good nite. not even a bye like he thinks im gonna come crawling.. around for him i think dunno.. That was the end.

Pretty sad to do that to someone after 5 years of LD.. and even after the person said i love u so much and im willing to do whatever to make this work with compromise and compassion I also said your not going to find a girl to put in as much sacrafice as i have done.. i mean ive waited i have had your back i have flown back and forth, and i told you i would marry you on top of that i told you i dont care if you burned your legs off today id still marry you, and i told him find your local girl with all ur great sex, and great fun and yes you can see her all the time, but isnt it nice when we take the safe side in life then the risky side that may be the true love we should be seeking... and he still was blind and set on the whole pride crap of well i told u not to do it!

So yeah it hurts pretty bad guys! Never in my life have i seen a man that stubborn. I love him i do.. and that will be hard to break for me but.. that is just obsurd.
So overall- When people ask me why we broke up the answer is.. he was so stubborn and had so much pride over something so drastically minor compared to what we have..so blind that he didnt even see real love when it slapped him in the face. He let all the good pass his eyes over for the very few bad we had i mean FEW GUYS we have never had fights like this.. so just AMAZING some people dont know how to humble themself nor do they always know that the grass isnt always greener and sometimes what ur looking for is under ur nose!

Maybe one day hell regret this!

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Old 03-26-2008, 01:22 PM   #12
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I'm sorry to hear this babebabe, but your right it is his loss. If he is continuing on being stubborn & won't try to even begin to meet you 1/2 way then there really isn't much more that you can do anymore.

It's time for you to move on, sure it will be hard, but you can do it.

We are all here for you too if you need us.
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Old 03-26-2008, 09:36 PM   #13
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For anyone that has been reading my story, we have GREAT NEWS!

during a message on chat :

he said feeling pretty crazy yet?

i said crazy im heartbroken beyond the word crazy more like maniac

he said well i did something crazy myself?

i said whats that..

he said well i use to fight and throw around cats all the time and they always use to land on there feet. but then i met this one she liked to fight, cat fought back, and when cat did that i realized she was the one for me.

he said u know what i did with that cat?

i said what?

i told it to go to the kitchen

i said what for?

he said to put it to work.

( for the comment i had made- and to show myself that he didnt deserve that treatment)

So yeah guys! Im off to Canada to be with my man.. we feel this was God working in us showing us each a sign!

Thanks everyone Im off to be with my man.

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Old 03-26-2008, 09:47 PM   #14
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By the way when i get tehre im gonna kick his Tail from here to tom for this .... crying i been doing! Rrrrrr.. but in fairness he was too he said, he didnt like doing this to me but felt it was the only way to see if i understood what we really are to each other. He said he wont do it again.
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Old 03-26-2008, 10:17 PM   #15
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hey this is great news! i think that is one of your, a language all of your own things im just glad you guys are seeing each other and working it out.
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Old 03-26-2008, 10:34 PM   #16
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yeah its a language of our own cats-are slang for women

Thanks take care!
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Old 03-26-2008, 10:38 PM   #17
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yeah i figured that out, but just talkign about cats in general was pretty awesome hey when are you going just wondering? and tell us all when you come back
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Old 03-26-2008, 10:44 PM   #18
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Im going to Ottawa leave soon in april, ill let u know when im back and how it goes.. i think the make up will be really awesome and we can be only stronger from this.. and really start focusing on our future.. the move, and some premartial counseling.


Again Take care thanks for reading all my post and responding.. i can only hope that others end with a ending like this!
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Old 03-27-2008, 12:46 PM   #19
**Sapphire**
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Very nice babebabe a happy ending! I'm happy for you & wish you a safe & happy trip to see your man. When you come back please be sure to keep us posted on how everything went, we do love updates.
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