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Old 09-21-2007, 05:15 PM   #1
theicechik
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Default Bi-Tendencies and Following Through

Okay, in another thread I mentioned that I had a period of my life where I was heavily into women. I call it my Bi-Days, in that I didn't go full blown lesbo because I still love men. I had some great times but something always went awry on the physical side. It probably has to do with the fact that deep down, I want to have a full emotional and physical relationship with a man, but since I've been hurt so much emotionally, I find myself going more with the physical aspects. With women, I'm looking for the emotional attachment but the physical never quite seemed right. Maybe there was still some guilt because of being raised in a religious household. I never let myself go.

But I'm getting some feelings again, within the last several months and I'm nervous to act on them because at least when I was in college, I was around sorority girls and we were all experimenting. Being close to 40, and not in an area that has gay bars, how would I go about finding like-minded women?
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Old 09-21-2007, 05:35 PM   #2
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It's a difficult thing to do...I am thinking that I would like my next relationship to be with a woman ( eventually of course ) I have had these feelings for years and don't really know what i would do when I was ready to make the step...Of course going to a gay bar makes sense but I would have to go on my own which is nervewracking on it's own..

The other way is to meet someone on an online site..which isn't ideal either..It's not easy..But people must manage it somehow
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Old 09-21-2007, 05:46 PM   #3
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It would be so much easier if I lived in a big city, but I don't. It's Desperate Housewives-central and it's a small enough town that word would spread.
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Old 09-21-2007, 05:48 PM   #4
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If only life was like the L~Word
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Old 09-21-2007, 05:58 PM   #5
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Originally Posted by ~Teej~ View Post
The other way is to meet someone on an online site..which isn't ideal either..It's not easy..But people must manage it somehow
Whether gay or straight, sometimes I wonder about what an 'ideal' site would be to meet and just have fun. And sex. Not necessarily in that order.
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Old 09-21-2007, 06:15 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by theicechik View Post
Okay, in another thread I mentioned that I had a period of my life where I was heavily into women. I call it my Bi-Days, in that I didn't go full blown lesbo because I still love men. I had some great times but something always went awry on the physical side. It probably has to do with the fact that deep down, I want to have a full emotional and physical relationship with a man, but since I've been hurt so much emotionally, I find myself going more with the physical aspects. With women, I'm looking for the emotional attachment but the physical never quite seemed right. Maybe there was still some guilt because of being raised in a religious household. I never let myself go.

But I'm getting some feelings again, within the last several months and I'm nervous to act on them because at least when I was in college, I was around sorority girls and we were all experimenting. Being close to 40, and not in an area that has gay bars, how would I go about finding like-minded women?
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Originally Posted by ~Teej~ View Post
It's a difficult thing to do...I am thinking that I would like my next relationship to be with a woman ( eventually of course ) I have had these feelings for years and don't really know what i would do when I was ready to make the step...Of course going to a gay bar makes sense but I would have to go on my own which is nervewracking on it's own..

The other way is to meet someone on an online site..which isn't ideal either..It's not easy..But people must manage it somehow
Could this be a budding romance??? If it is good for both of you!!!

I have to say I have experimented numerous times back in the day. Haven't really thought about it much. I do have a couple of lesbian friends that I look at as sisters. Who knows?????
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Old 09-21-2007, 07:04 PM   #7
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If only life was like the L~Word
I've heard of the show, but have never seen it. Can you share what you mean?
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Old 09-21-2007, 07:08 PM   #8
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I am sure there are tons of sites that you can use to find people who are looking for the same type of thing. In addition to the regular type of dating sites, you may want to look at craigslist.org.
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Old 09-21-2007, 07:17 PM   #9
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I am sure there are tons of sites that you can use to find people who are looking for the same type of thing. In addition to the regular type of dating sites, you may want to look at craigslist.org.
I've checked CL before and none of the ads in my area seem real. They all seem like its a joke, or its a guy pretending to be a girl, and there are no pics or when people do post pics they are either a true representation (which turns you off immediately because they aren't attractive to you) or they are obviously fake.
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Old 09-21-2007, 07:22 PM   #10
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I've checked CL before and none of the ads in my area seem real. They all seem like its a joke, or its a guy pretending to be a girl, and there are no pics or when people do post pics they are either a true representation (which turns you off immediately because they aren't attractive to you) or they are obviously fake.
I dunno. My brother in law used it and he ended up dating the girl for a few months. Granted, she was a stripper, but that was a plus as far as he was concerned.
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Old 09-21-2007, 07:35 PM   #11
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You actually brought up something I was thinking of. Going to a strip club. To you guys out there... have you ever seen a woman who isn't working, sitting in a strip club? I figure a few of the dancers have to be bi right?
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Old 09-21-2007, 07:43 PM   #12
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You actually brought up something I was thinking of. Going to a strip club. To you guys out there... have you ever seen a woman who isn't working, sitting in a strip club? I figure a few of the dancers have to be bi right?
Even if they are...do you really want to get with a stripper? No offense but I see that as not far above hooker. I think there are better places to meet someone...
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Old 09-21-2007, 07:49 PM   #13
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Even if they are...do you really want to get with a stripper? No offense but I see that as not far above hooker. I think there are better places to meet someone...
I agree. I guess that I could see why a man would want to, but a woman? Must be better places to meet.
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Old 09-21-2007, 07:53 PM   #14
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Even if they are...do you really want to get with a stripper? No offense but I see that as not far above hooker. I think there are better places to meet someone...
But that's the thing. In my mind they aren't hookers. Your SO can't bring a disease home to you after looking at a girl take her clothes off on a stage. I'm open-minded, believe me, but I guess personal loss has made me very very jaded toward prostitution but I don't have the same attitude towards strippers. It's a fine line for some people sure. So what do you recommend???
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Old 09-21-2007, 08:21 PM   #15
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*shrugs* Hey...whatever makes you happy. As for reccomendations...I don't know. I don't think a bar is that great of an idea. But I wouldn't really know. Online perhaps like someone else suggested
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Old 09-21-2007, 11:31 PM   #16
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I've heard of the show, but have never seen it. Can you share what you mean?
It's a show about lesbians and bisexuals...they live in a town..it's a great show..has the very pretty kate in

Kate Moennig MySpace Pics
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Old 09-24-2007, 03:10 PM   #17
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What channel is it on. I'll have to check it out. Although I do have to say though that my taste is for more the "lipstick lesbian," especially the girly-girl, which stems back to my college days when you had two young, firm coed roomates sharing everything and then some.
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Old 09-24-2007, 03:41 PM   #18
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I do not know as I am not from the states...i tended to download the series..i am naughty..Hee Hee..Ad the dvds are pretty easy to find online I think n
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Old 09-24-2007, 03:53 PM   #19
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I do not know as I am not from the states...i tended to download the series..i am naughty..Hee Hee..Ad the dvds are pretty easy to find online I think n
Duhhhh. That's right you're in the UK. I knew that. Oh, I just looked it up. It's on Showtime here in the States. I don't have Showtime, but I'll check out some online clips and then maybe pick up the first season on DVD. I'm looking at the IMDB entry for the cast list. I absolutely love Jennifer Beals. I remember when I saw Flashdance for the first time and that was when I had my first bi-urges. She really looks good, even now.

So what kind of woman are your urges leaning towards? Based on your post of Katherine Moennig's pic, I'm assuming you may be into the ambiguous look... not quite masculine, not quite feminine?
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Old 09-24-2007, 04:21 PM   #20
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Thats true...But if you check out the other thread you will see that I love Eliza Dushku as well...Oh how I would marry her if I could lol.

The Lword is good...I think you will like it...although sadly real life is not like that and it is in no way as easy to get to know people
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Old 09-24-2007, 04:34 PM   #21
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Thats true...But if you check out the other thread you will see that I love Eliza Dushku as well...Oh how I would marry her if I could lol.

The Lword is good...I think you will like it...although sadly real life is not like that and it is in no way as easy to get to know people
She's a little hottie too!
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Old 09-24-2007, 04:41 PM   #22
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Hee Hee..See I have taste.

I am quite fussy when it comes to people I am attracted to..Be it men or women.

They are both lovely in my eyes
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Old 09-24-2007, 08:55 PM   #23
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Hee Hee..See I have taste.

I am quite fussy when it comes to people I am attracted to..Be it men or women.

They are both lovely in my eyes
Oh, you definitely have taste. Kate is beautiful, she just doesn't do it for me like the way the girly-girls do. Take Scarlett for example. OMG!
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Old 09-25-2007, 02:47 PM   #24
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Yeah, Scarlett is a good choice to :P
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Old 09-25-2007, 04:06 PM   #25
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Here I am posting in a thread, I thought I'd never do. After ending a short relationship with my BF, I think I am interested in finding out about the same side. I'll post more as I figure this out.
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Old 09-25-2007, 09:03 PM   #26
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Originally Posted by ~Teej~ View Post
Thats true...But if you check out the other thread you will see that I love Eliza Dushku as well...Oh how I would marry her if I could lol.

The Lword is good...I think you will like it...although sadly real life is not like that and it is in no way as easy to get to know people
I have liked her ever since her Buffy the Vampire Slayer days. Good choice.

If it came down to it, I would definitely choose David Boreanz instead.
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Old 02-24-2008, 04:50 AM   #27
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This is an old thread, but if nobody minds I would like to add a little to it.

Hey,, nothing like bringing an old thread back to life.

I'm a guy, and yes I've been with a couple of guys. They were never for any love or relationship things, the only times I was with another man were in wife/couple swapping situations and it was all purely for sex. Basically we all were there for the same thing and just for the sexual enjoyment.

And I have to admit I did enjoy it. But as far as being Gay, no I'm not. Even though I did enjoy being with another guy, I could never trade the feeling that a woman gives to a man.

Now don't get me wrong, I didn't say I wouldn't be with a man again, I did like it, but it's not something that I couldn't live without,

So yes I guess I'm bi, and the experiences that I've had showed me that you don't have to have a love relationship with someone of the same sex just to enjoy it. As long as you are safe and everyone is in agreement then I don't see anything wrong with a guy getting a hard one or a gal getting a wet one.

Now on to a more recent note...

Dreamer and I have been getting into this lifestyle somewhat, and I would rather not care to go into any details in this venue but let me just say if it don't hurt anyone and everyone agrees, then go for it.

Cloudy
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Old 02-24-2008, 07:32 AM   #28
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Yes, I have been with another woman. It was years ago and my only time and truthfully I didn't enjoy it. She wasn't my type. But I am interested in trying one again because I do get turned on by a pretty woman.

And as ridingacloud said, me and him have discussed swapping and I've been reading up on it not to mention getting alot of info from him. I realize that it takes alot of trust and I mean 100% trust and you can never let feelings of any kind get into it. Just sex.

What scares me is where to meet a couple. The net is dangerous and before I commit to that I want to make sure they are safe with up to date papers and everything. No diseases of any kind.
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