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Old 07-06-2012, 06:26 PM   #1
alexrose1039
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Unhappy **Need** Advice regarding boyfriend's sister. Help.

So I'm going to try to cut a very long story very short and just leave the important parts in.

So I was out to lunch with my boyfriend and his sister and brother-in-law. We're in Quebec, except I'm from England so everything is in French. I tried to order my food in French and made a mistake, so his sister makes fun of me and made me feel horrible. A fight shortly followed. I admitted that I over reacted about everything after and apologised and I thought it would be left there.

A week or two later we were going out to a crepe place and she made fun of me again by texting my boyfriend saying he's going to have to read the menu to me. I asked her to stop and she continued to make fun of me. Another fight ensued and my boyfriend got really f***ing mad and shouted at her epicly. His family was involved, I was involved. It wasn't pretty.

So the issue is now, she's blaming me for everything. Even after I apologised for almost everything. The only thing I won't apologise for is my boyfriend shouting at her. I didn't make him shout at her. I asked him to stay out of it. But she insists it's my fault, and now also thinks its my fault that he doesn't call her often enough. My boyfriend is stubborn. If you tell him what to do, or what not to do he gets angry and does whatever he feels like regardless if it's the best thing to do or not. So I have ZERO influence on whether he calls her or not. She lives a few hundred miles away and such, hence the calling instead of going to see her.

So I texted her again, apologising for everything again, and that I over-reacted, but brought up the fact that I feel it's unfair for her to blame me for his actions. She said, "It's all chain reactions, my dear."

A few weeks later his Mum took me aside and started questioning me if I could make her son happy, and since when am I an expert on how her daughter feels, and the ball is in my side of the court and I'm the one who has to fix it. Which also upset me becuase I've been trying.

I've been miserable about this for 3 months and will do ANYTHING to avoid seeing his sister. I'm even opting out of going to the water park because I don't want to see her. I've seen her once since and tried to apologise and all I got in return was "I will never forget." The only thing I can think of that will make me feel better is if she realises that his actions are not my fault and that they're his. He says that it's never going to happen.

I'm completely miserable, and it bothers me a lot. Every time I start thinking about it I get upset. When I hear her name I get grumpy. It's to the point where if I get a few minutes alone to think, I just start thinking about it and everything goes downhill from there. I know I shouldn't let it bother me as much as it does, but I don't know how to stop caring.

If anyone has any kind of advice, please help.

P.s. I know she lives a few hundred miles away, but she comes down to visit very frequently, and she and my boyfriend are very close.
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