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View Poll Results: What should she do?
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Old 12-08-2009, 02:14 AM   #1
noypipride7997
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Question My cousin is wondering....

She doesnt know what to do because she wants to get rid of a crush on this one boy who shes only seen twice!!
She's only 16 and i can't give her good enough advice for something like this, here's an email she sent me (i changed the names and changed teh story a bit so it's short enough to have enough information and it doesnt give away any names):

"So I've had a crush on this one guy from a different school. First time i heard about him was at a friends house where a this guy sent my friend "a voice clip of him singing". We later find out its this one guy (let's call him aaron) and find out he has a youtube and we watch some of his videos and i don't feel anything toward him at all just liked his voice. Then (5 months later) me and my other friends go to a concert, i see aaron backstage and i don't think much of it and pass him by. Then me and my friend go watch his performance (he sang and played guitar), still not feeling anything towards him. After his performance the mc calls me over and asks me to perform too, so i go backstage to practice(since it was my first performance i was nervous). And so i go backstage and ask one of my friends (lets call him aj) if he can play a song with me, aj says sure and says oh aaron can play with us, and he calls aaron. Aj explains and aaron let's me borrow his guitar since we all knew the song we didn't have to practice. he seemed so nice and he smiled at me and, that's when i get a crush on him.... so all 3 of us perform and finish. So i talk to aaron and we have the same interests in music. He even offers to teach me a song and he asks questions about what school i go to, and how old i am, what my hobbies are, and we exchange information, and he seemed very open in telling me things.
So the next time i see him is 2 months later at my niece's 1st birthday. And And so him and his friends break danced for my niece, Our tables were right next to each other, so he willingly talked to me a couple times but it was all about music and what song i was going to play because i was scheduled to play.
By now all my friends know i liked him, So im about to go up there but then i complain to my friends that i can't decide on what song to play and that i really wanted to play she was mine but its a duet. The break dancers over hear, then they start chanting, "aaron! aaron!" and he seemed like he really didn't want to go. He finally gives in and tells me he'll sing with me if he gets to play the guitar. so i say fine and we sing but we only had 2 mics and the guitar needed its own mic. So i asked the mc if he could bring over and extra mic, aaron says its fine and says that we can both share one mic. so i say ok and after the performance. i hear his friends tell him, "oohhhh some body's falling for aaron!" and then i freak out, My friend then tells me he's a jerk, and then my other friend said he's crazy. so i go to school the next day and ask my friend(who doesn't know i like him), she says he's a smart *** and hes a jerk. But my friend says he might just seem mean on the outside, she also says he's sweet and makes songs for his girlfriends. So now im trying to get over him because i don't want to fall for a jerk, but maybe i should keep liking him because maybe my other friend is right? Should i wait to see how things go? Any help cuz?"

i believe the guy she likes is either 16 or 17...

if you need anymore infromation then let me know and ill ask her


thank you
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Old 12-08-2009, 12:59 PM   #2
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Welcome to ATLF!

Best thing that your cousin can do to help to get rid of this crush is to not be around him anymore, not have any kind of contact. If she's in contact with him or hangs out with his friends or in a group, it's only going to solidify the crush more.

Time & distance heals things like crushes, break-ups etc..
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Old 12-09-2009, 06:37 AM   #3
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thanks for that advice, i guess that is the only way...

but now she thinks that its a better approach if she tried to be friends with him first but that would completely ruin the whole "dont make contact with him" thing

and she might end up liking him even more
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Old 12-09-2009, 12:56 PM   #4
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True, most times when a person is around someone they like, the feelings won't go away.

Maybe it will be a help to her to be around him, who knows. Different people feel & go through different things.

I would suggest to her the no contact first & if that doesn't help, maybe try hanging with him to see how that goes.
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