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Davey Crockett
04-05-2006, 04:09 PM
Tips On How To Maintain Long Distance Relationship


We define relationship as the condition of attachment between individuals. There is a common bond that connects them. Our present society is so complicated, not counting the busy movement of our daily life. In view of this situation, a lot of people still prefer to live in overly populated cities whereby they spend their time more in the office. That is their existing and comfortable world, to the point that even the name of their neighbor is even unkown. But we still find certain type of relationships such as with families, friends, boyfriends or girlfriends, lovers, and with co-workers.

There is a big challenge for us to maintain honestly the relationship where we are involved. And we need to really nurture and preserve the relationship regardless of some problems. We should be very much committed to it; otherwise, we will be courting disaster to prevail over us. At the start, we should be clear about what we are committing ourselves to.

If there is difficulty in maintaining a relationship between two people wherein they live in the same place, then it is more difficult to sustain such relationship when the other person is geographically apart from you. We had so much time for each other as if nothing can separate us anymore.

Before you know it, it happens unexpectedly. After saying goodbye, the person will be many miles away from us. Perhaps, he or she transferred to another school to pursue an ambition, or a new job was offered to him. We find ourselves involve in a long distance relationship. A relationship which has been taken granted for quite a long time. There is a saying which says, out of sight, out of mind. Now, when we really miss the most valuable person in our life. We are at a loss on how are we going to handle such situation. Emotionally and psychologically, we are affected. There is unpreparedness in us.

There are two different types of long distance relationships. The first is the couple who have known each other for quite a long time. They are planning to live together for life as married couple. However, due to the distance of being separated, complicated problems and present obligations, to be together as soon as possible is temporarily impossible. On the other hand, the couple know each other from somebody, through the cybernet or via an advertisement in the papers. From time to time, they communicate by email, letter writing or by phone.

We have to admit that it is very expensive and difficult to have a long distance relationship. There will be a sudden rise of telephone bill expenses, being eager to open mailboxes, feeling of jealousy and being forgotten and taken for granted, as a consequence of being in loved. It could happen that we will reach the point of getting even to the person because of some rumors of cheating our relationship.

No matter how difficult it is to be in a long distance relationship, still we should not be discouraged but life must go on. We have some tips in order to maintain a long distance relationship. They are as follows:

Put no blame to anybody just because you feel bad about the relationship.
Communicate effectively
Show that you are committed to each other
Preoccupy yourselves with some interests like culinary arts and not just your love for each other
Talk about something on being abandoned, being free and to be disappointed
Decisions should be made mutually
Take separation as something natural to happen
Take the risk and continually trust each other
Encourage one another to be independent
Expectations must be stated clearly
Have quality time for each other, though being alone must be respected
Have some get together once in a while
Exert some effort to make the relationship work for both of you
Avoid being suspicious and jealous
Share the expenses of keeping in touch

typingdancingqueen
04-07-2006, 02:12 PM
Thank you for that wonderful article. Yes, honesty is the best policy and it is very important to be honest in any friendship or relationship.

When a dating or serious relationship is a long distance one, it can be a bit difficult to say the least. It costs quite a bit for telephone long distance unless of course one gets a special telephone plan. Also when one needs to ship presents, it costs for the UPS or the post office to send out holiday gifts to say their children.

c_thina00
04-10-2006, 06:15 AM
Thats a great advice, actually I'd experience a long distance relationship before and it really don't work for us, I think we have lack of trust and patience.
So TRUST and PATIENCE is the most important, you need to sacrifice if you really love each other, because thats a part of it.

encoder
04-15-2006, 11:04 AM
Long distance relationship is never an easy thing. I have in a long distance relationship for twice already and both failed though both of them are still my good friends.

For me, Commitment and Communication are the most important part when it comes to long distance relationship. Constant communication will open the each others feelings and any misunderstandings will be cleared. Commitment will make both parties honest to each other.

typingdancingqueen
04-27-2006, 11:09 PM
:p Yes, I too have dated in the past several people that had lived quite a few hours away and once many states away. The distance was a problem on all of those friendships and dating relationships, as it was difficult to try to get together or do things together being so far away. Most the time was spent on the phone which was good to talk to them, yet one does not have the person there to do things with very often and soon both of you tend to find some other person that lives in the same area that you actually live in yourself.

preciousgirl
08-21-2006, 07:05 AM
That is wonderful advice for trying to keep your long distance relationship going strong. Everyone knows that trust and communication is the most important. Before you get into a long distance relationship I feel you should know that person well enough to know that you can trust them. You are open minded to hear everything he/she may tell you has far as meeting another man/woman who they say is just a friend. In one word trust that is what it really takes

feistychik
09-07-2006, 11:38 PM
I am currently in a long distance relationship...well, we live an hour apart. But, we talk all day, everyday whether it be through email, messengers or on the phone. Communication & trust is huge in a long distance relationship. My boyfriend and I actually met online & are now engaged. If anything, I think the distance we spend apart helps strengthen the relationship. It makes you a more trustworthy, understanding & tolerant person. That's what I've learned through it all, and I think it's made me a better person...:p We travel twice a week to see eachother...he comes here, I go there and this has worked very well for us. It's exciting when two things that normally don't work out, work out so well. (long distance & online dating).

Desire
10-16-2006, 08:16 PM
Has there ever been a successful long distance relationship? I think its nice but it does not end up in the long run, I knoe we have all tried but there is just too much to worry about, is he seeing someone else? If he is not home where is he? I cant handle that.

aqua
10-17-2006, 05:40 AM
In this fast life being in long term relationship is really difficult. Thank so much for such an wonderful article. I believe only one rule applies in a long term relationships which is accept your partner as they are.

lovebites
10-26-2006, 07:10 PM
Giving space to our partner is the most important way through which we can maintain our relationship for long. We should allow our partner to maintain and develop his personality. He should be given space to take his decisions and thus we should not interfere in any or every move which he takes. He should be given freedom to make his friends and should always not be cross questioned.

Julie
10-27-2006, 02:06 AM
I am not into long distance relationships and I really do not see how this can ever work, yeah it sucks if a loved one has to move away for whatever reason, but I guess its up to the couple involved.

audreycsmith
12-16-2006, 04:17 PM
I don't know how many of you have been there, but I sure have. He is so right in everything he said. I had a long distance relationship, three in fact. One was my first marriage, and he had to go in the service for two-four years. We broke up for a while, and rekindled our relationship after he was discharged. We lasted for seven years, than went our separate ways. Distance, does not make the heart grow fonder. In the separation period, I met another person. We lasted for over 32 years, (Mostly by phone or email). I miss him. He left his job, and is no where to be found. He resides in New York City, is living with someone and has a stepchild. I continued our relationship, because it was there. I took on a relationship after my separation, and this person lived in town. We lasted for over eight years. It was a lust love. He could cheat, hate, etc. me, but I was there when he wanted me to be. Oh, the heart aches, and the love. It is a killer. When he moved to Buffalo, NYC., I spent every dollar going to see him for weekend ventures. I did this for over a year and a half, and then settled down to a relationship back in my town.

I found out I was pregnant. Had to go through nine months wondering who the father was. It was dreadful. My man in my town, was the father as I expected. Luckily he stood by me, married me, and we have two daughters now. They are 22 and 20 and we have been in the same relationship for over 24 years now. It hasn't been the best marriage, but it is there. I still think of the last two of my relationships all the time. I would love to see them again, just to say hello, but my life is on a full plate right now, and basically, I am content.

The days of power, money, and travel are over for me now. I am contented as a housewife, working woman, and lover to my husband, and mother to my children.

Have a wonderful Christmas and I look forward to more tips when you have them.

Sincerely,

Audrey C. smith

DodyMorisson
02-24-2009, 06:52 AM
Thanks for the advices. I have a L/D right now for just 1 month. My girl almost sad everyday because we really miss each other right now.
Thanks again I hope it works well for my relationship.

aussiecoffee007
02-26-2009, 01:49 AM
its hard dody but its soo worth it if youre with the right person....

devendra3047
09-23-2009, 07:42 PM
TO maintain long distance relationship, honesty is very important.
you are faithful to your partner. love and respect him/her.

sushilsilicon
07-26-2011, 10:50 AM
Have A Clear Plan For Your Next Meeting

One of the things that make the distance so hard to deal with is the hopelessness. When your unable to see the person you love for any extended period it’s easy to start to feel like you will never see them again.
Having a clear defined time for your next meeting gives you both something to look forward to and helps a lot when things are especially hard. The more concrete and detailed the planed meeting the better.

Find A Way To Keep Intimacy Alive

Distance doesn’t change the needs of either person in the relationship. The foundation of any good relationship is intimacy and that doesn’t just mean sex. There are a number of things that can be done to maintain a feeling of closeness even from a far.
A good example is to set up nightly talks on the phone where you share thoughts, feelings and details of the day. Knowing that your voice is last they hear every night before they drift to sleep can be one of the most intimate feelings in the world.

Honesty and Avoiding Any Doubt

Another reason long distance relationships are so difficult is trust. It’s easy to say you trust someone, but when you’re far away and all you have to go on is his or her word it’s much more difficult. In this situation more than any other it’s positively vital that you are 100% honest about everything.
Chances are you are both going to make mistakes. Talking about them and not covering them up is the only possible way for this sort of relationship to work. The moment any doubt is expressed it’s extremely hard or even impossible to get back to a place of trust.

Spend Plenty of Time Together

Just because you’re far away from each other, doesn’t mean you should spend all of your time apart. With the help of cell phones, it’s easy to stay connected to each other and talk often even on the go.
Another great resource to ease the pain of a long distance relationship is Skype. Skype allows the two of you to see and talk to each other face to face. All that’s required for Skype is an Internet connection and a computer. It doesn’t even cost you a penny.

Do More Than Just “Talk”

No matter how much you enjoy talking to someone, there comes a point when conversations start to get a little stale. Planning activities to do together on the phone or on the Internet is a great way to enjoy each other’s company without getting bored.
The easiest example of something like this is to watch a movie together while on Skype. Calling the other person on Skype and then watching the same TV program or a movie on HBO is fun, easy and most importantly breaks up the monotony.

Well, there are countless ways to make it work. It all depends on your perspective.

loveaddict2
11-14-2011, 07:18 AM
I have tried everything and I am about to give up.