Sad, Angry , and have completely lost hope

[dejectedartist]

was rejected today. No surprise, I can live with it. But I honestly thought this was going to work out this time.

I'm the typical nice guy. I can't flirt for **** and my confidence is nearly none existant, and when those fleeting oppertunites to come along where I'm stupid enough to beleive I've find someone who finds me the least bit desireable, I put all my heart and emotion into it.

But girls seem to dispise me for this. It's the only way I can describe it. O hsure they're amused by it at first, then they grow tired of your doting, tender nature and fling you aside like a used condom left-over from the sex you're never going to have.

I just don't understand it. You women out there spend your lives *****ing about how you can never meet a sensitive guy, yet even when you're surrounded by them you still prefer to go for the macho ***-holes who look at women the same way trucker look at their next cheese-burger at the drive-thru.

Youl'd rather take the time to make a romantic gentalmen out of a total jerk, but won't even give nice-guys like me the time of day.

So it will only be around this time that they start to look our way, not becuase they want us, but becuase we're the only ones who still desire them.

I am so angry right now. I'm so angry I don't know whether to scream, curse, cry or puke. I honestly have come to a point in my life where I beleive that I will never find companionship.

not sex, but companionship, some to love and to be love by. Someone to share myself with completely.

Stupid, I know, but what am I supposed to say? Those are the things I want in my life and yet every cosmic power that's got its all-powerful thumb in this disgusting pile we call an existance, seems hell-bent on making sure that I end up dying alone.

I met a girl and I fell in love. I though what I felt for her meant something, becuase it was unlike any other feeling I had felt in my life.

I hate life for how much of a struggle it is for me, and I hate myself for not being what others want.

I've lost all hope this day, and quite honestl;y I don't know why I even continue to bother.

the answere?

Becuase I'm retarded enough to hold on to that tiny sliver of hope that I may find someone, but I'm not holding my breath.

'm an introvert alright?

I don't get out often, and it's a climb-up Mt. Everest whenever I try to branch out and poke my head out of its shelf. It's hard for me to relate to anyone even those that would be considered my peers

I often find myself stradling the various social boarders and finding no acceptance in either one them.

As far as girls go...... what can I say. I try to be kind and tender, the loving sensetive type that they're always *****ing about not having. But obviously that's not what they're looking for.

I find out about them, figure out what they like and try to work with that.
What else can I say? I don't have the self-esteem to talk to a girl with an 'I don't care what she thinks of me additude.'

I'm so angry and hurt, and disgusted and everytime I look in the mirror I want to puke blood.

So I'm sorry if this post is a little angrier than most others but what am I supposed to do?

WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO!?

[**Sapphire**]

Welcome to ATLF dejectedartist, glad that you joined us here.

I'm sorry that you came here with this kind of news though. I can understand your hurt & anger at the unfairness of love. It does suck when you love someone & they don't love you back or maybe don't think of you in the same ways. We see & read posts everyday from people that have been hurt. Love, just like life isn't fair, we just have to go through each day though & do what we can to move ahead.

I know this may sound cliche', but there is someone out there for you, yeah you haven't found her yet, but you will. It's being patient that will be the hardest part & also keeping the hope that there is someone out there.

Not every woman likes the bad guys that will treat them badly, so please don't lump us all into that category. Many, many women, just like yourself don't want to be treated badly, we want a nice, caring, sweet guy such as you described yourself. We sometimes get stuck with the bad guys, just as you have had your share of bad women. We get angry, throw fits & then we muddle on through until we find our good guy.

You don't have to change yourself to be a bad guy or have that type of attitude, all you need to do is continue on being yourself, because that is the true you, not any "airs" that you could put on for a woman or women to like you.

[Pink]

I couldn't agree more with Sapphire. I understand how you feel and it's tough to go through. I'm sorry. :(

Not all women are that way, and I hope you know that deep down. Sometimes they get stuck with the "bad boys" and don't realize it until later on. There are millions of loving and caring women out there in this world so don't lose hope. You can't just give up like that no matter how angry you are. You just have to pick yourself up and move forward. I'm having to do that in my personal life right now, and it's not easy. :(

Just please, no matter what, don't think of every woman that way because it isn't true. You'll find the right one when it's the right time. I might be today or a year from now, but you just have to let nature take it's course. And never change who you are for anyone! I wish you the best.

[MickeyDeanEveryone]

Hey buddy, sorry you're going through such a mess. I am responding because most of my adult life I have been in the same boat you are in, the 'nice guy who gets screwed over for a jerk off guy'. First off, let me agree with Sapphire and Pink, because there are some amazing women out there who are grounded and know what they want in life and make better decisions.
Some advise for you though, do not change your core values and ALWAYS treat women with the love and respect that you have been doing because that is what makes you 'you' and better than those jerk-offs who look at a women like a car or a material object.
Here is a little secret though :thumb:.....you don't have to be a jerk to be confident, they are completely different and should not be categorized together. Most people in general are attracted to people who seem to be genuinely happy and confident in who they are no matter if they are in a relationship or not. It gives off stability which is very important in a relationship. That is why the jerks get the girls, because they have that....just they so happen to be jerks as well.
So my point is that you can be the nicest guy in the world and still have confidence in yourself knowing that you will be happy no matter what happens and that you will eventually find someone who deserves you.
Also you will soon realize that a woman who is shallow enough to not be with you because of your 'niceness' is not at your level intellectually and that you deserve someone who makes better judgment.

So don't change buddy....a true gentleman with confidence is unstoppable :cool:

-Mickey