Anci82
11-19-2011, 07:23 AM
Hi every1,
I’m new on this forum but I rly need some advice n opinion from ppl who r objective.
I’m in a long distance relationship for 3 years now, we were seeing each other every 2-3 months for a period of a week-10 days n rest of the time we were spending in front of pc chatting though yahoo n other programs that allow that. We live in different regions of Europe so we r rather far n not so cheap to come to each other more often, at least wasn’t in the past, now there r finally cheap flights between our countries.
Anyway from start we were trying to figure way how to b together for good n I was willing to move to his country, since I already speak his language plus economy is much better than in mine, but he couldn’t get proper full time job due to economy crises everywhere in Europe, plus we both still live with parents n we r both over 25 but it doesn’t pay off to rent a flat when u need money for plane tickets n everything else.
Anyway I got so attached to him n he was to me, we loved each other, when we r together its perfect, ofc I’m aware that it wouldn’t b like that always if we lived together but I’m sure he is the person who can keep me interested who knows what I love n share my interests.
Our relationship was always very passionate in every sense, when it comes to making love or to jealous about wall post on FB or similar or just expressing feelings toward each other though all these years. We had ofc a lot of fights about some stupid stuff but that was mainly all coming from that unstoppable passion n we wouldn’t talk for few days n we would get together n love each other even more.
Well real problem started when my BF realised that he has to go bk to school for few more years or he wont b able to get a proper job without it, I believe that he got the fixation in his head that we cant possible last that long. I was saying to him that I don’t care that Ill w8, that ill try to sort my life as well as much as possible to provide something from my side.
For almost 1 year he got into some depression over his “failure” which I never saw like that, I was trying to make him happy n to boost his self confidence but he was slowly pushing me more n more away, seamed like he is defending from me like I’m his problem n not crises in the world, all that caused me to completely loose my self-confidence, to start thinking that he got some1 else there, that he doesn’t love me which lead to me having panic attacks that he will leave me n I got so lost but at the end due to my friends I seeked medical help n I’m getting better now. In meanwhile he got job which he need as experience for getting into uni, I’m bk to uni already n working full time n during next year Ill sort my flat n Ill start to live alone so he can come visit n stay as much as he wants.
Doctor advice me to first make a distance so I can clear my head n get some rest, since I wasn’t able to sleep due to all the tension n similar, n once I did made distance my BF got ****** n said he needs time off, at that point I told him that I was trying to get better n that doctor told me what to do, but he kept repeating, whats the point of us being together if I don’t even hear u n so on. I left him b for 2 more weeks after that until my head got clear n I realised that I definitely want to b with him n that I cant live in fear of loosing him n so on, so we started txting each other at first was ok n then he started being cruel n at the end started ignoring me. That caused that Iv started falling apart again n at the end I finally made him come to skype to talk to me, he was rather mean, he said he doesn’t want to b with me, that he maybe doesn’t love me enough, this is for the best, he cant b chained to pc, but he said mean things to me often before when he is mad n I must say I wasn’t any better when I get ******, conversation ended by chating since he couldn talk to me anymore n wrote “if ur gonna be so fuckin stubborn then have it ur way, we'll tlk tmw, just never fuckin blame me for any hurt in ur future” …”love u nn kiss”.
I rly love him n I believe that he loved me 1month ago when I was visiting him last time n tho all these years we were together n If Im so blind n crazy that I cant face that some1 can turn bk on u for gd in such a short period pls guys tell me, just pls tell me anything u think or any advice because I want him bk n Ill give n do anything to try to save us if that’s possible.
I’m new on this forum but I rly need some advice n opinion from ppl who r objective.
I’m in a long distance relationship for 3 years now, we were seeing each other every 2-3 months for a period of a week-10 days n rest of the time we were spending in front of pc chatting though yahoo n other programs that allow that. We live in different regions of Europe so we r rather far n not so cheap to come to each other more often, at least wasn’t in the past, now there r finally cheap flights between our countries.
Anyway from start we were trying to figure way how to b together for good n I was willing to move to his country, since I already speak his language plus economy is much better than in mine, but he couldn’t get proper full time job due to economy crises everywhere in Europe, plus we both still live with parents n we r both over 25 but it doesn’t pay off to rent a flat when u need money for plane tickets n everything else.
Anyway I got so attached to him n he was to me, we loved each other, when we r together its perfect, ofc I’m aware that it wouldn’t b like that always if we lived together but I’m sure he is the person who can keep me interested who knows what I love n share my interests.
Our relationship was always very passionate in every sense, when it comes to making love or to jealous about wall post on FB or similar or just expressing feelings toward each other though all these years. We had ofc a lot of fights about some stupid stuff but that was mainly all coming from that unstoppable passion n we wouldn’t talk for few days n we would get together n love each other even more.
Well real problem started when my BF realised that he has to go bk to school for few more years or he wont b able to get a proper job without it, I believe that he got the fixation in his head that we cant possible last that long. I was saying to him that I don’t care that Ill w8, that ill try to sort my life as well as much as possible to provide something from my side.
For almost 1 year he got into some depression over his “failure” which I never saw like that, I was trying to make him happy n to boost his self confidence but he was slowly pushing me more n more away, seamed like he is defending from me like I’m his problem n not crises in the world, all that caused me to completely loose my self-confidence, to start thinking that he got some1 else there, that he doesn’t love me which lead to me having panic attacks that he will leave me n I got so lost but at the end due to my friends I seeked medical help n I’m getting better now. In meanwhile he got job which he need as experience for getting into uni, I’m bk to uni already n working full time n during next year Ill sort my flat n Ill start to live alone so he can come visit n stay as much as he wants.
Doctor advice me to first make a distance so I can clear my head n get some rest, since I wasn’t able to sleep due to all the tension n similar, n once I did made distance my BF got ****** n said he needs time off, at that point I told him that I was trying to get better n that doctor told me what to do, but he kept repeating, whats the point of us being together if I don’t even hear u n so on. I left him b for 2 more weeks after that until my head got clear n I realised that I definitely want to b with him n that I cant live in fear of loosing him n so on, so we started txting each other at first was ok n then he started being cruel n at the end started ignoring me. That caused that Iv started falling apart again n at the end I finally made him come to skype to talk to me, he was rather mean, he said he doesn’t want to b with me, that he maybe doesn’t love me enough, this is for the best, he cant b chained to pc, but he said mean things to me often before when he is mad n I must say I wasn’t any better when I get ******, conversation ended by chating since he couldn talk to me anymore n wrote “if ur gonna be so fuckin stubborn then have it ur way, we'll tlk tmw, just never fuckin blame me for any hurt in ur future” …”love u nn kiss”.
I rly love him n I believe that he loved me 1month ago when I was visiting him last time n tho all these years we were together n If Im so blind n crazy that I cant face that some1 can turn bk on u for gd in such a short period pls guys tell me, just pls tell me anything u think or any advice because I want him bk n Ill give n do anything to try to save us if that’s possible.