online daing services

[coonsanders]

hi
whats the deal with these online dating services..i used to be part of match
and most of the women are strange.one lady i responded too said"call me lenny" but i dindt havew her number.another we exchanged numbers and shes
been calling and leaving strange messages and hanging up..plenty of fish they
just dont want to meet in person..i was writing to these 3 ladies and we were
getting along good..i suggested we meet and they took off..its a dating site.
why do they join if thry dont want to meet?whats the point?

coonsanders

[**Sapphire**]

Welcome to ATLF, glad that you joined us here. :welcome2:

Unfortunatley alot of people play games when they join dating sites. I think the free 1's are even easier for scammers/game players to join. There is not risk to them to hurt someone's feelings that is legitimately looking to date someone.

Have you thought about trying to meet a lady in real life?

[coonsanders]

hi
nice to meet you..o yes ive tried it in the real world..but its very hard around here..people are very shallow and very much into looks...if your rich and very
good looking your highly wanted by these ladies..so i tried these dating sites.
thats my story..

coonsanders

[njoyabl]

I think some people are reluctant to meet up in real life because of some of the crazy stuff going on. Look at the Craigslist killer. For me, I work in an all male correctional facility and have a different look at what others don't because of the portfolios that I read on people who you wouldn't think could do these kind of things because they don't look the part, raised in good loving families and so forth. So, to tell you the truth, I've been on dating sites before and what I look for is someone who spends quite a deal of time getting to know me. I analyze his personality and so forth. I never offer any information of where I live or ask them the same. If we were to meet, it would be in the daylight for coffee or something. A nice public place.

Try not jumping to meeting them to quickly because people should be cautious and I hope that people who do online dating are. Spend time having lots of conversation and maybe allow her to bring up the topic of meeting you. Therefore she has initiated the face to face contact which means that she may now be comfortable enough with you to meet you. You should be the one to suggest a public place during the day so that she knows that you want to ensure that she has nothing to worry about because you aren't trying to get her alone with some hidden agenda.

[**Sapphire**]

I think some people are reluctant to meet up in real life because of some of the crazy stuff going on. Look at the Craigslist killer. For me, I work in an all male correctional facility and have a different look at what others don't because of the portfolios that I read on people who you wouldn't think could do these kind of things because they don't look the part, raised in good loving families and so forth. So, to tell you the truth, I've been on dating sites before and what I look for is someone who spends quite a deal of time getting to know me. I analyze his personality and so forth. I never offer any information of where I live or ask them the same. If we were to meet, it would be in the daylight for coffee or something. A nice public place.

Try not jumping to meeting them to quickly because people should be cautious and I hope that people who do online dating are. Spend time having lots of conversation and maybe allow her to bring up the topic of meeting you. Therefore she has initiated the face to face contact which means that she may now be comfortable enough with you to meet you. You should be the one to suggest a public place during the day so that she knows that you want to ensure that she has nothing to worry about because you aren't trying to get her alone with some hidden agenda.

Very good advice!! :thumb:

[coonsanders]

hi
i was told to ask them out immedately because if you dont they will get board and leave..but usually wait for a few weeks till i ask them..and i mostly suggest going for coffee at a diner..one lady who i responded to gave me her number after we talked for a few times..i called her twice and she finally got back to me saying "im just calling to return your calls"i then told her about myself hoping shed do the same..all shed say was "thanks for sharing".so i
wanted to find out whats going on so i went to the site and found that she
had closed her account..

coonsanders

[njoyabl]

This time let it be the woman who asks to meet you. If they get bored then they probably weren't very interested in the first place. Some people just need something to occupy their time and do use internet dating sites for their personal entertainment. Not to put others down, but sort of to get a self esteem boost. Also, even if you get her number, don't start calling until there is talk of actually meeting and then you maybe call to make plans. Give her your number and let her be the one to call you.

It can be a little scary trying to figure out who you want to date that you have never met in person yet. Allow her to initiate this contact allows her to build her self confidence in this meeting being as she was more aggressive in contacting you. This may be a sense of security for herself. If everyone was willing to just meet up with everyone they meet online, that would make them pretty naive and I would hate to think gullible.

[coonsanders]

thanks ill try and it in mind...

coonsanders