How to get her to like me again?

[detente]

Hello everyone,

This is my first post on this forum. I am a 16-year-old guy and I am posting here because I have somewhat of a problem. Let me tell you the story first.

About half a year ago, I met a new girl at school. We became friends, and it was clear to me that she liked me (in fact, I heard from some others that she was crazed in love with me). At that time, I didn't feel anything special for her. I only just liked her as a friend.

But now, half a year later, we are very good friends but I am starting to really like her. Unfortunately, her love for me is no longer existant. I really regret the choice I made in the past, and I want her back badly.
I've already asked her to come over to my house so we can play videogames together (that is both our hobby :P it kinda links us together). She's been here twice now, but it doesn't seem like she shows any interest in me anymore.

I am looking for advice: how can I get her to like me again? I greatly appreciate any replies.

[stoner]

Sorry man, but the ball - at this time - is in her court ... if she still has feelings for you, then she will let you know.

At the present, all you can do is be yourself ... the way you've always been before, during, and after you met her. Besides linking via video games, you could do other stuff together, such shopping together for games you two haven't tried yet, but getting a good vibe around the gaming community. Swap each other's games and then talk about it together - warts and all. Perhaps, see some live action film together, that was based on a popular game?

Who knows, the "linking" via games could branch out into other areas, and covering topics beyond just games? Best of luck to you and do keep us posted, whenever you can.

[**Sapphire**]

Welcome to ATLF, glad that you joined us here. :)

I agree with stoner, at this time there isn't much you can do on getting her "back".

I say just like stoner did, be yourself, enjoy the friendship you 2 have & who knows, maybe something more can/will develop from that friendship. You have a good thing to link you 2 together & build on. Try some of the examples that stoner posted, maybe that will help.

If it doesn't though, you do have her as a good friend & that's something to be happy about. :thumb:

[detente]

First of all, thank you for your replies. Like I stated in my original post, I greatly appreciate them.

The suggestions you gave were pretty solid, but I think it will still be difficult to get out of the so-called 'friend-zone'. Anyways, I have another question for you:

We have both been playing on online game (world of warcraft) for months now, and we have been chatting almost every day. We had good times together, but I somehow feel things were getting a little bit stale lately. But now I have quit that game, so we won't be chatting anymore all the time.

The question being: does less availability (as in: no longer talking every day, but seeing her only once a week) improve my chances with her? I personally think so because things might have gotten a little bit stale after talking to each other every single day for almost half a year. But when seeing each other only once a week, you know... it may bring back 'the spark' if you know what I mean. She will miss me when I'm not there for her.

I'm pretty sure she is going to miss me when I'm no longer there every evening (on the online game) because she stated (not to me personally, but I got my sources) she finds me very very nice company. Perhaps she still likes me a little bit, deep from the inside... I'm going to try to pull these feelings out of her ;D

[**Sapphire**]

She could miss you a bit more & want to talk to you more or hang out more. You will have to see when you aren't playing the game anymore & she still does.

When you 2 hang out talk to her more, maybe you can see if you can figure out if she does like you more.

[detente]

Do you think I should ask her on a date? Like watching a movie or something? I can hug and try to kiss her afterwards :) But before doing that, I would flirt with her at school. Would that be a good idea?

[**Sapphire**]

You could do that, but I wouldn't ask her like it's a date. Maybe a hang out evening & see where things can lead from there.

If she isn't thinking of you in a romantic sense she might back off if you ask her on a date.

I would flirt with her a little bit while at school, kind of feel things out see if she is still interested, but to shy to make a move herself.

[detente]

You could do that, but I wouldn't ask her like it's a date. Maybe a hang out evening & see where things can lead from there.

Yes, this was my plan already. Do you think going to the cinema together would be a good idea?

I would flirt with her a little bit while at school, kind of feel things out see if she is still interested

Yes, this was also the plan. Would trying to make some innocent physical contact be a good idea? For example when I see her I grab her shoulders and shake her (in a fun and innocent way) whilst yelling 'hi how are you today?'. I think she will find that funny :P

And now for a personal question, Sapphire: have you ever fallen in love with a guy (assuming you are female) and became really good friends after? (without any love from him involved) And if so, would you still want to have a romantic relationship with him if he showed interest in you after a few months?

[**Sapphire**]

No I have never been friends with a guy that I was in love with, it hurt too much to see him, knowing I care for him.

[detente]

Ok things are going really well! I flirted with her and she did it back. We poked and tickled each other and it was very nice. It is indeed going better since we don't talk to each other as much as we used to. She's probably still interested. (Maybe she isn't but I'll find out soon enough)

Thanks a lot for your suggestions and support :)

[**Sapphire**]

You're welcome, best of luck to you. Keep us updated on how you are doing.

[detente]

You're welcome, best of luck to you. Keep us updated on how you are doing.

Ok the update is here: physical contact and flirting is going pretty well, but now a new problem arises: how do I set the next step? Would it be a date, or maybe find a reason to hug her?