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View Full Version : My high school crush is soooo close (figuratively)


ms960
08-17-2010, 03:15 PM
I recently found someone on Facebook that I knew in high school. In high school, I had the hugest crush on this girl. I didn't have multiple crushes in high school; I had one. That’s singular. I only had one crush, but it was a big crush and lasted as 6 years (jr high and high school).

She was gorgeous and smart and had it all together. I was kind of nerdy, so I never had the guts to talk to her or ask her out or anything. High school came and went without any interaction between myself and her, so she really didn't know who I was, I don't think.

Recently, and after a little detective work, I found her on Facebook. She's halfway across the country from me now, married and with kids, which is awesome as far as I'm concerned. I'm married (no complaints) with kids as well.

I finished high school well over 20 year ago, so it's nice like this all just happened, but over the past 2-3 years, I've had dreams of her. Not a lot, but maybe half a dozen dreams in a couple year period. I never dream about people and remember them, but her, I do remember the dreams vividly.

Since I found her on Facebook, I've been very tempted to just send her a short message. Something like "Hi. I know you don't remember me from high school, but I very much remember you. I saw you on FB and just wanted to say hello. Hope you are well."

I would have no expectations of a reply, nor would I want this to lead anywhere other than maybe catching up.

I'm struggling with whether it would be weird (to her) for me to say hello. Part of me says I shouldn't bother, it's over, move on, etc. But, part of me says there's no harm in just a short hello, with no expectations of a reply. If she's weirded out, she won't reply anyways.

Would a short note be received well or poorly by her? Without knowing anything about her, I know that's a hard question to answer, but in general, if a girl got a short email from a guy who said he had a crush on her in high school, would that be flattering or disgusting? Would she think I'm weird/strange/a stalker, etc.?

Should I email her?

**Sapphire**
08-17-2010, 03:27 PM
Welcome to ATLF, glad that you have joined us here :)

Why not send her a short "hi how are you" type of message, but I would leave out the crush part. That just very well may weird her out if told to her right off the bat.

Test the waters first with a general hello, see if she would like to talk, & then maybe down the line you can tell her that she was your crush for a long time.

It's been a long time & it will possibly take time for her to warm back up to you. reminisce about the "old days" first.

ms960
08-17-2010, 04:48 PM
Sapphire -- Thanks for the welcome.

Oddly, most people I ask say I should under no circumstances contact her. She's married; I'm married; we didn't know each other in high school. I'm probably still glamorizing the memory I have of her in high school, and may still have a crush on her (after all these years), so I would be contacting someone who doesn't exist.

So, those are good reasons NOT to say hi to her. Still very confused because of the regrets I carry from not getting to know her in high school.

learning2trust
08-18-2010, 08:08 AM
are you not happily married? if not, then i can see why you are in such a dillema

ms960
08-18-2010, 10:09 AM
are you not happily married? if not, then i can see why you are in such a dillema
I won't say my marriage is idyllic, but it's not bad at all. i get your point, however. and understand what you're saying.

**Sapphire**
08-18-2010, 11:44 AM
Yeah your friends have a good point in that if you 2 didn't know each other in high school there's no reason to contact her through FB.

I was thinking more of a general type of contacting as there are people that do that when they find someone they knew in high school.

It might be best though to forgo contacting her & just leave her be. You are both married & you did have a crush on her in HS, so yeah it's best to leave her be & not contact her.