Had a nervous breakdown and ended my relationship

[Beverly]

WARNING: SUPER LONG POST

Hello,

I'm brand new here. Last night I don't know what happened to me.

I had huge meltdown. My fiance and I have had some problems for a while. About 1 month ago, he hacked my email and facebook. He saw some msgs between my ex and I. The messages were not I love you msgs or anything like that. Just how are u and stuff. The last msg was November.

I was supposed to move into an apartment he got for us and when I was moving "too" fast he panicked so, I went back to my place. At this point I had already given up my cat that I had for 4 years (for him). Our relationship was full of breakups prior to this incident but, he insists that the emailing is the reason for being a jerk to me. I have appologized profusely about the emails/facebook.

In the meanwhile, I have been having trouble at work (my boss is really picking on me) and my parents are divorcing. The parents divorcing is not really bothering me, it's how my younger brothers are coping that is hurting me.

Anyway, I can't talk to my fiance about any of the things that are on my mind because, he is not a sensitive person and will probably tell me i'm ridiculous or to get over it. He knows that something is wrong with me. He's asked and I said "yes. something is bothering me, i don't want to talk about it with you."

Anyway, yesterday he was shouting AGAIN. I was talking to my aunt about my family issues and he gave me a calling card to use. I said to my Aunt, "i'll call you right back with a calling card. *** is giving me funny faces." (all with a laugh and smile). He started to tell me i'm crazy and that i make him look bad. blah, blah, blah. At this point I'm now angry. What the hell? I was joking. So, I flipped out wayyyyyy too much. It was a combination of all the crap going on in my head.

I don't know what to do. I think I've realy lost my mind. I can't cope anymore. I have so many things going on at the same time. The person that is supposed to be my rock giving me more problems over minor details.

Help!! What can I do? I can't go back to him. I need to move on and don't know how.


Thank you. There's so much more to tell but, I've written ALOT already.

[**Sapphire**]

Welcome to ATLF, glad that you joined us here. :)

Sounds to me like you did the righ thing by breaking things off. He's not sensitive, you can't talk to him about things & plus he mistreats you. What kind of marriage would that be if you 2 did get married hun?

I don't think you over reacted at all, I think you are justified based on the way he's treated you.

[Beverly]

I know I did alot of things wrong last night. I went truly nuts. I was throwing things, yelling, and crying uncontrollably. While I was having my freak out session, he just sat on the couch and barely looked at me. By the end of it all, he made me walk home (4 blocks), while he drove off. I got very, very drunk last night and passed out. He phoned 2x last night and 2x today. I answered today and he said, he just wanted to see how i was doing since I didn't answer last night. I haven't left the house today and I honestly don't want to either.

Thank you for responding to me Sapphire. He is not supportive. I know I did alot of things wrong last night. I went truly nuts. I was throwing things, yelling, and crying uncontrollably. He just sat on the couch and barely looked at me. By the end of it all, he made me walk home (4 blocks), while he drove off. I got very, very drunk last night and passed out. He phoned 2x last night and 2x today. I answered today and he said, he just wanted to see how i was doing since I didn't answer last night. I haven't left the house today and I honestly don't want to either.