How do i know if she is the one?

[pika]

Hi, rather confused lately, how do i know if this girl suits me?

I had a crush on this girl, but just that there are some things i just cannot accept. She love wearing super short skirts, fancy dress, love clubbing, love talking to guys, etc etc....and all these i just cant stand it everytime she do it in front of me unknowingly... i assume this is her character....but i always will try to convince myself that i can accept them...all her flaws....especially when i talk to her, i can be so submissive to all her request......even thou at times i am so furious about it...the moment i see her or talk to her, my heart will melt.....when i don't see her, i find my day miserable.....

sometimes i wonder is it because i am just overwhelm by just winning her over that i did not consider about these things.....

I was in the same scenerio once before and just when the girl was ready to say yes to my pursue, i back off.......

How do i know she is the right one for me???

[Penguin_Woman]

Seems to me that you are infatuated by her. But she sounds completely wrong for you. Those little quirks that you think you can deal with. Could become the source of a lot of arguments should you get together. She seems the type that even if you guys were together she'd still do the same thing. Can you handle it if you were together and she still wore those skirts and still flirted with guys? I know you think you can. That's infatuation...it ignores the other persons flaws. But that's not real love IMHO.

[Taryn]

a bumpy start can be fixed. however, when one begins to reconsider their relationship, i think it's going to get a whole lot worse before it gets better. the choice is yours, but no matter how hard you try, it will remain in the back of your mind.

take tux's advice, she may not be the right kind of person for you

Hope that helped!

[summit]

Pika, in my opinion if you have to ask yourself if she is the one, she isnt.

I think you need to be a bit more assertive, and not so submissive, if there is something you cannot accept about her, let her know and it either works out or it dosnt, if it dosnt then move on, obviously she wouldnt have been what you were looking for anyways. You cannot keep quiet about it and expect change, women like to know a man can stand his ground on issues important to them, if your always letting her walk on you and do what she wants, she will not respect you.

[pika]

thanks for all advices.......

yah i had some serious thoughts last night and i suppose i know the answer. And i have noticed too that being too submissive seems to have spoil her behaviour to take things for granted....

she care less about my feelings and also she was not as attentive towards me like the past.....

I also noticed that when something goes wrong, for example, she was suppose to wait for me one morning, and she left before i reach, ended up she blame me for not reminding her about it....sometimes i wonder if i really can stand all these behaviours when we are together.

there seems to be enough hints that i may not suit her..think its time i learn to let go and choose the right one for me....

[EC]

Nice to know you have a crush bro! Having a crush is good, being crushed is not lol

Why don't you tell us what you like about this girl? If you are not already aware, the way she dresses, acts, engages in conversations, and what not, are the way she is.

It's herself, her personality, her values, you already see it as flaws. If you cannot accept this, and you are going to complain about it down the track it like you ask her to be someone else to suit you. If she wants to change for you, all good, but if not then you don't want to be labeled manipulative. Let me warn you that when that happens its feels getting a big kick in the nuts.

Being submissive to requests also make you lose your individuality, if this is to move forward both of you will need to compromise and grow a lot.

It's difficult to define who's right for who, every relationship have compromises, but they have to be mutual. If you are serious about it you have to talk to her, though you will risk losing her but end up lying to yourself and each other that you're happy is going to do the same thing, slowly.

[pika]

Nice to know you have a crush bro! Having a crush is good, being crushed is not lol

Why don't you tell us what you like about this girl? If you are not already aware, the way she dresses, acts, engages in conversations, and what not, are the way she is.

It's herself, her personality, her values, you already see it as flaws. If you cannot accept this, and you are going to complain about it down the track it like you ask her to be someone else to suit you. If she wants to change for you, all good, but if not then you don't want to be labeled manipulative. Let me warn you that when that happens its feels getting a big kick in the nuts.

Being submissive to requests also make you lose your individuality, if this is to move forward both of you will need to compromise and grow a lot.

It's difficult to define who's right for who, every relationship have compromises, but they have to be mutual. If you are serious about it you have to talk to her, though you will risk losing her but end up lying to yourself and each other that you're happy is going to do the same thing, slowly.


I dont really know EC....i miss her day and night.....i worried about her day and night.....She is a pleasant girl...a girl at her age (24) might love to dress more daring, her past time, shopping etc...what attracted me to her is really personality...when you talk to her, you will find that there are no acting or pretence in her.......

she do things the way she likes...and still at the moment show some concern for others.....

I am afriad that the things i try to pick on her was my sense of frustrations....that sometimes she dont really notice me......

I am still very confuse too........

[EC]

Looks like a big personality crash to me.

[pika]

Looks like a big personality crash to me.

haha...think i better pull back and take another note on her...dont wish to fall intot he same plight as well.....