Eloping? I love you? Marriage?

[aussiecoffee007]

How do you guys feel about eloping?

How early do you think it is to say I love you?

How early in a relationship do you think is good to start talking about marriage?

Feel free to answer all or one, in no particular order. I'm just curious to what you guys think.

[mashmac]

Eloping - romantic! Think that's what I would do if I could do it again.

To say I love you - I believe you do need some time to be sure. Several months at least to be sure? But I was always very cautious with that. But i the heat of passion the words can escape from your mouth and that's kind of cute :)

Marriage? Anytime really cause it just gives you a sense of finding out if the other person even contemplates marriage at all in their live. In my younger days I remember mentioning marriage and kids quite rapidly...and it was fine.

But look - I AM A HOPELESS ROMANTIC!!!!!!!!!!

[aussiecoffee007]

same. absolutely hopeless. how early do you think is too early for eloping? I've always been cautious with I love you, as well, (I was about to say too and that would have sounded odd :) ) but recently my boyfriend has began saying it and I feel like I love him but i dont know if I should wait longer... but what's the point of waiting for the sake of waiting?
and is it fine to mention marriage relatively early? it never hurts the relationship or anything?

[Penguin_Woman]

Eloping can be very romantic and exciting I'd consider it, but only problem is your family kinda misses out.

Saying "I love you": To be honest? Whenever you feel it. I actually said it to Tuxie 9 days after we first "met" online. Now, almost 20 months later I still feel the same way

Marriage: Again...whenever you feel it's right. Might be 2 years, might be two weeks (it's happened). If you truly love that person and they love you and you wish to spend your life together...go for it as long as you both are of age.

I'm an even more hopeless romantic! lol

Edit: If your bf is saying it, Aussie and you feel like you do too then say it. Marriage can be brought up early if you feel he's receptive to it. Not to scare you, but if he's not he might be a bit freaked by it. But I'm thinking if he loves you it's prolly not too early.

[mashmac]

Yes - I really don't think bringing up marriage is a problem, I mean if you feel that connection normally it is reciprocated. That is how it works. Ah...that is all so nice! :girl:
And eloping - you can always have a big fiesta when you are back!

[aussiecoffee007]

yeah tuxguy hes actually begun bringing up marriage, which is something entirely new and welcome for me, usually im the serious one that scares them off. hes said i love you and i do love him, and ive told him that and now were in that crazy-in-love stage and hes saying we should get married, in 6 years when he can come to the states for me, and all im thinking is that it seems like its moving too fast but it all feels right. it feels like ive met HIM, you know. my soulmate. hes visiting in june and im trying not to get caught in it until then, but i cant help it. i love him. then the more i think about it, the more i think... i want to elope with him, run away somewhere together. he lives far away as ive mentioned and my parents would never let us be together, but thats all i want. to be with him.

[Penguin_Woman]

yeah Tuxguy hes actually begun bringing up marriage, which is something entirely new and welcome for me, usually im the serious one that scares them off. hes said i love you and i do love him, and ive told him that and now were in that crazy-in-love stage and hes saying we should get married, in 6 years when he can come to the states for me, and all im thinking is that it seems like its moving too fast but it all feels right. it feels like ive met HIM, you know. my soulmate. hes visiting in june and im trying not to get caught in it until then, but i cant help it. i love him. then the more i think about it, the more i think... i want to elope with him, run away somewhere together. he lives far away as ive mentioned and my parents would never let us be together, but thats all i want. to be with him. You mean Tuxette? hehe Well...have you met this guy face to face? How long have you known him?

[aussiecoffee007]

ay carumba! sorry tuxette. i only looked at the tux to make that referral :) its not EVEN tuxguy anymore. i need some work. lol ive known him for 3 months dating for 2. thats what i mean by early. no i havent yet, we video chat all the time though, every day, hes coming in june.

[mashmac]

June is so close! So just enjoy it all until then and all will be revealed!

[Penguin_Woman]

June is so close! So just enjoy it all until then and all will be revealed!
*nods* Yeppers. I agree with Mashmac. I'd probably hold off on talks of marriage until such time as you actually meet each other. June's not so far off, though I'm sure it seems it. :) I know how that can be.

[aussiecoffee007]

i know it seems like ages but i know its only like three months away! i figured we should wait for the marriage talk until we see how we get along in real life. i just dont see how we cant :)

[skatermom]

>>>>>>I think if a church wedding is important to family or to yourself, you should do that instead of eloping. But if it's not, then hey, why not. It's totally romantic.

How early do you think it is to say I love you?

>>>>>>Well I think this is an age-old question. And I don't think there is a correct answer. I think it all depends on the situation and the persons involved. I think it's wonderful to FEEL love for someone you connect with, but I honestly think the L word is thrown around a little too much these days, too soon, and without justification. You can say I love you to a friend. But anything more than that, I think, should actually wait a while. At least until after the getting-to-know-you phase.

How early in a relationship do you think is good to start talking about marriage?

>>>>>>Again, that all depends on the persons involved and the situation. Marriage too, I think, is something that is thrown around too carelessly these days. I think there should be ample time spent getting to know each other, AND I think two people should LIVE together before they get married. Get thru that for at least a few weeks THEN see where you are in the relationship. And if it's all hunky dory, then go for it.

[aussiecoffee007]

ah well a church wedding was important to me, and it is to my family, but they wont accept him and i love him. plus i cant live with a guy before im married to him...
litlte update, it turns out he might not even be stationed in my STATE so any ideas on how to see him? :confused: :confused: :confused:

[EC]

Sounds romantic but I would be more proud of a woman that stands up for her rights, shows her maturity. Not sure why you guys have to elope.

Romantic stories and fairy tales feeds on euphoria'ism, honeymoon, and mistakes.

PS: Some where down the track when it hits the fan, the family of the one that ran away with you will totally nail you down :)

I am such a pessimist.

[mashmac]

It's not a show a force in front of you family. If you really do it, it's for the two of you and nobody else. I am not sure to quite understand why your family would be so much against him. If they are conservative I assume they would rather see you married. They don't even know him - why would they dislike him or why do you think they will?

But really there is no rush to do anything - just enjoy it, love, be loved back and again June is so close. Take it from there. You don't need to decide anything right this instant.

[aussiecoffee007]

my parents are more than conservative, my mom is a racist... and he is from colombia. his parents wouldnt mind us eloping, i don't think, they are happy for him. i know, I'm not deciding, but it will be inevitable and i want to be prepared. june seems so far now, feels like ages. every day my heart agonizes over it.

[**Sapphire**]

How do you guys feel about eloping?

How early do you think it is to say I love you?

How early in a relationship do you think is good to start talking about marriage?

Feel free to answer all or one, in no particular order. I'm just curious to what you guys think.

I brought this back up as I thought these are some good questions to share with you all, very good questions Aussie.


I think eloping would be romantic. Throwing caution to the wind & just doing it, you & the 1 you love.

I don't think there is a set time to say "I Love You" when your in a relationship. I think when you feel it, you should say it.

The talking about marriage I think is about the same as saying i love you I think. Although, you should spend some time getting to know your partner before you talk SERIOUSLY about marriage. If it's just talking in general then I think anytime would be ok.

[laura_lee88]

"i love you's" - well i don't think you should say it unless you truly mean it, If i was in a normal relationship i doubt i would say it for a long time, most people use it loosly these days IMO.
Marriage - i think you could ask this anytime, think about it...why spend all your time with someone if they don't want the same as you, i think its somethin i would ask quite soon same with children, i love children and i don't think i'd like if i was with someone for a long time, and falling inlove with them, only to find out they don't want children, but thats just me lol

[Beautiful Mystique]

How do you guys feel about eloping?

I am from a close knit family so eloping is definitely out of the Q plus I want my family and close friends to be at my wedding - it's not everyday that I get married (I sure hope not!!).

How early do you think it is to say I love you?

I don't think there's a timeline to this one. For me, it's when I feel real, strong feelings for that person that I'd let him know I love him - that usually doesn't happen after 4 or 5 months in the R. My current R, my honey said it first only after 2 or 3 months in and all I said was... thank you! But we say it more often now - every other day or week.

How early in a relationship do you think is good to start talking about marriage?

Can't answer for others but it was probably after our first meeting which was almost a year after we got to know each other. My previous R - we talked about it quite seriously after a year we were exclusive. Marriage isn't something I take lightly so I avoid talking about it in early stage of the R. In retrospect, I have only talked about it to 2 men and I had about 3 or so serious R before this.

[Eros]

just DO IT sincerely

[situationist]

How do you guys feel about eloping?

How early do you think it is to say I love you?

How early in a relationship do you think is good to start talking about marriage?

Feel free to answer all or one, in no particular order. I'm just curious to what you guys think.

Eloping sounds awesome, I would love to do that!

Say "I love you" only when you mean it.

I have no idea about marriage, it depends on how old you are, what sort of stuff is going on in your lives, and so on. Personally even if I had been a relationship for 5 years I wouldn't talk about marriage until I've finished university and am fairly secure financially. But if I really loved them, I might decide to do it anyway.

[aussiecoffee007]

im not sure if i should wait to be completley financially secure or just know that it will work out and we can still get jobs even if we are married. i kinda dont want to elope because i want my parents there... i would hate to be a parent and put so much love and energy into a child and not be there for one of the most important days of their life...