Bleeker
06-12-2008, 01:26 AM
My ex and I have been going through a confusing situation. Im gonna try to make this as straight to the point as possible, probablywill end up being very long, but anyway, during the last week of my school year my GF was acting very funny, she didnt want me to hold her hand, wasn't saying goodbye, didnt let me give her a kiss on the cheek, and ended up leaving my graduation party at my house which was a party that didnt include dancing or anything like that (religious reasons) to go to a party with rap music and lots of dancing and she didnt even say goodbye! Her mom came at 4 am to pick up her little brother at my house, turns out that she came in the car as well but never got out of the car, she was afraid of showing her face to me and my parents! My mom saw that she was hiding, my parents werent to happy, neither was I. The whole time she was acting weird i gave her her space, i knew she was getting through something. I called her, turns out she was confused about our relationship, didnt tell me why yet. A few days later she told me she wanted to go on a break, i got really sad and thought our relationship was gonna end. To make things clearer, I didnt do anything wrong, it was just my GF, she says she was confused.
She ends the break telling me that she wasnt giving our relationship all of her heart, she was still talking with another guy that she "used" to really like. This guy at the time was in college in Tennessee while we are in Florida. In the beginning of the relationship I told my GF that she had to stop talking to Joey (the other guy) the same way cuz she was going to be with me, she agreed, but now she tells me that she was still talking to him!? (We were together for 2 months) She said that she wanted to make our friendship stronger by starting over and that she wasnt going to talk to Joey anymore (this is what she told me at the beginning of the relationship, only difference is, she is gonna cut him off completly) She said that she wasnt telling me everything all her secrets and stuff, but she was telling Joey. I agreed with her plan at the time.
So i continue to talk to her over the phone almost everyday, but then i speak to close friends and family, and post threads on different websites about my situation, 90% of the people i talk to tell me to move on! This wasnt my first intention! Time goes by, my mind slowly sways to what others are telling me, i start to think, hey maybe they are right, maybe she is just with you because joey isnt around anymore or because he has a girlfriend now. About 3 weeks after our break, my mom tells me that her friend and her daughter are coming to my house! I havent seen this girl in about 10 years, we used to hang out at my house a lot when we were about 7 years old. As soon as she entered my house, i couldnt take my eyes off of her! She seemed very mature, friendly, commited, hard working, all this good stuff, i start to think about this girl, but wait a minute, im supposed to be making my relationship with Claudia(GF) stronger! What's going on? I end up calling Amanda(mom's friends daughter) to my house, and we end up going to the movies with my little cousins, my sister, and aunt. We had a great time, i spoke to her a lot, i just couldnt stop smiling.
Now im thinking, great, what happened with Claudia, after she tells me that she wont speak to Joey and she wants things to be better this time, i go out and hang out with Amanda? I continue to talk to Claudia on the phone, we talk casually most of the time, but i had to let her know how i was feeling. I wasnt sure if things would work out. We dont really have much interests in common, our morals are SLIGHTLY different, and she says it herself that she is fickle. When I talk about how she continued to talk to Joey, she at one point told me "I told you so". And another thing that she said that bothers me is something like this>>>> Im the type of person that needs to find someone else to be with so that i can get over my ex. This made me think, am i just a replacement for Joey? She says that she has tried before to get over joey be being with other guys but it hasnt worked, suppposdly she wants me to be her best friend now, not Joey.
Right now im confused, do i give her a second chance or do i move on? There's a lot more to this whole story, too much to write down, i really dont know what to do. Is it true what they say, once a cheater always a cheater? Maybe i was being blinded by love when i first thought that i should forgive her? Maybe everyone is changing my mind with their talks, i know i do this often, change my mind because of what others say. I mean, im the only one that knows the whole story, all the details, all the feelings. Everyone else doesnt know what I know, all the details, how Claudia really is. Sometimes when i think of why i like or liked Claudia, its hard to think of things! I really love her company, she makes me laugh all the time, and its sooo easy to talk to her, im totally comfortable with her. And i must admit, i miss kissing her, she was my first. When i was telling her that maybe we should just be friends, for a moment she was ok with it, and i was too, i spoke of memories and good times we had, my mind was sent to the amazing times i had with Claudia, and i began to cry. I told Claudia that they were tears of joy, i was happy that i was in a relationship with her, she made me so happy, she made my last 2 months at my high school the best two months i have ever had. Then all of a sudden, Clauida began to get angry at me! She freaked out when she heard me say tears of joy, she called me a monster!! I didnt understand, just a minute ago she was ok with just being friends, and i think i was to. She also didnt like the fact that i mentioned the possiblity of either one of us finding a special someone, she said that she didnt want me to find sumone else, she still wanted me for her!
Hmm, i missed one detail, the one that made me come to the conclusion that we should just be friends. Claudia said that she didnt deserve me, that i was to nice, and she was too fickle. She said she wasnt right for me. I thought how can i want to get back with someone who thinks that she isnt good enough for me, while im having doubts about her fickleness as well. So right now, i really dont know what to do, maybe im being foolish by listening to others and changing my mind, or maybe this is the right thing, to move on. Did crying while talking about our past mean that i still have strong feelings for her? What's going on, plz help.:(
She ends the break telling me that she wasnt giving our relationship all of her heart, she was still talking with another guy that she "used" to really like. This guy at the time was in college in Tennessee while we are in Florida. In the beginning of the relationship I told my GF that she had to stop talking to Joey (the other guy) the same way cuz she was going to be with me, she agreed, but now she tells me that she was still talking to him!? (We were together for 2 months) She said that she wanted to make our friendship stronger by starting over and that she wasnt going to talk to Joey anymore (this is what she told me at the beginning of the relationship, only difference is, she is gonna cut him off completly) She said that she wasnt telling me everything all her secrets and stuff, but she was telling Joey. I agreed with her plan at the time.
So i continue to talk to her over the phone almost everyday, but then i speak to close friends and family, and post threads on different websites about my situation, 90% of the people i talk to tell me to move on! This wasnt my first intention! Time goes by, my mind slowly sways to what others are telling me, i start to think, hey maybe they are right, maybe she is just with you because joey isnt around anymore or because he has a girlfriend now. About 3 weeks after our break, my mom tells me that her friend and her daughter are coming to my house! I havent seen this girl in about 10 years, we used to hang out at my house a lot when we were about 7 years old. As soon as she entered my house, i couldnt take my eyes off of her! She seemed very mature, friendly, commited, hard working, all this good stuff, i start to think about this girl, but wait a minute, im supposed to be making my relationship with Claudia(GF) stronger! What's going on? I end up calling Amanda(mom's friends daughter) to my house, and we end up going to the movies with my little cousins, my sister, and aunt. We had a great time, i spoke to her a lot, i just couldnt stop smiling.
Now im thinking, great, what happened with Claudia, after she tells me that she wont speak to Joey and she wants things to be better this time, i go out and hang out with Amanda? I continue to talk to Claudia on the phone, we talk casually most of the time, but i had to let her know how i was feeling. I wasnt sure if things would work out. We dont really have much interests in common, our morals are SLIGHTLY different, and she says it herself that she is fickle. When I talk about how she continued to talk to Joey, she at one point told me "I told you so". And another thing that she said that bothers me is something like this>>>> Im the type of person that needs to find someone else to be with so that i can get over my ex. This made me think, am i just a replacement for Joey? She says that she has tried before to get over joey be being with other guys but it hasnt worked, suppposdly she wants me to be her best friend now, not Joey.
Right now im confused, do i give her a second chance or do i move on? There's a lot more to this whole story, too much to write down, i really dont know what to do. Is it true what they say, once a cheater always a cheater? Maybe i was being blinded by love when i first thought that i should forgive her? Maybe everyone is changing my mind with their talks, i know i do this often, change my mind because of what others say. I mean, im the only one that knows the whole story, all the details, all the feelings. Everyone else doesnt know what I know, all the details, how Claudia really is. Sometimes when i think of why i like or liked Claudia, its hard to think of things! I really love her company, she makes me laugh all the time, and its sooo easy to talk to her, im totally comfortable with her. And i must admit, i miss kissing her, she was my first. When i was telling her that maybe we should just be friends, for a moment she was ok with it, and i was too, i spoke of memories and good times we had, my mind was sent to the amazing times i had with Claudia, and i began to cry. I told Claudia that they were tears of joy, i was happy that i was in a relationship with her, she made me so happy, she made my last 2 months at my high school the best two months i have ever had. Then all of a sudden, Clauida began to get angry at me! She freaked out when she heard me say tears of joy, she called me a monster!! I didnt understand, just a minute ago she was ok with just being friends, and i think i was to. She also didnt like the fact that i mentioned the possiblity of either one of us finding a special someone, she said that she didnt want me to find sumone else, she still wanted me for her!
Hmm, i missed one detail, the one that made me come to the conclusion that we should just be friends. Claudia said that she didnt deserve me, that i was to nice, and she was too fickle. She said she wasnt right for me. I thought how can i want to get back with someone who thinks that she isnt good enough for me, while im having doubts about her fickleness as well. So right now, i really dont know what to do, maybe im being foolish by listening to others and changing my mind, or maybe this is the right thing, to move on. Did crying while talking about our past mean that i still have strong feelings for her? What's going on, plz help.:(