i need advice

[penguin85]

ok so me and my bf just had our 1year...but our relationship is so confusing and complicated! it would take 2 long to explain so ill shorten it! he broke up with me after we dated 3or4 monthes cuz he said he needed space and i loved him so much i was heartbroken! i told him i couldnt be friends cuz it would hurt 2 much so we stopped talking! then he called me out of the blue 3weeks later and comes to my work and crys and tells me hes sorry and loves me so much....and i still loved him so i took him back! then everything was fine we were 2gether another 4monthes and he told me he loved me and was glad i took him back and could never go without seeing me and i was so happy! then he tells me he needs more space! omg ******* im heartbroken again but this time i tell him ill try and be friends....that didnt work 4 me so i cut off all connections changed my cell # and he knew my mom would kill him if he called the house. so im trying to be ok and hang out with friends and im slowing getting over it but it would take time! then a month later he keeps calling me at work and my stupid friend gave him my # cuz he told her he loved me so much and he couldnt stand not talking or being around me! so i agreed to meet with him for coffee be4 work and we kinda talked and it felt weird to me cuz i love him soo much and im not with him! so we decided to not call it a relationship but we only wanted to be with each other and no1 else! that was working for a while but we llove each other so much we just get closer and closer and it ended up a relationship again! we were both so happy and then just 4days ago he called me and tells me he wants to break up again...im like omg r u serious!! so this time i said thats it i told u i wouldnt do this again...thats the end i can never c or speak 2 u again goodbye and i hung up.....he calls me like 3 times and i dont answer...but the 4th time i had already been cring for awhile i answered and said what do u want thats it....hes like thats how u want to end it im like hello u broke up with me! but i cant go the rest of my life without seeing or talking to you! i said 2bad and hung up.....he calls 2more times so i said stop thats it....no i dont want it to be it im sorry i dont want to break up!! now my ? is what do i do....i love him so much that i could never love neone else the same no1 could ever replace him!! its only been a year but we've talked and been through so much it seems longer and he loves me 2 he says im the only one with his heart and no1 could replace me.....but we have little fights all the time....we both suggested we c a relationship counsler but i dont know.....HELP!~:confused:

[aussiecoffee007]

This is just pulling you around, get over him and move on. you need to just avoid him at all costs, you see his number calling and DO NOT PICK IT UP. dont call him, dont do anything with him, hes using you and pulling you around and dont take it. Just tell him youve found someone else and move on. If you need tips on how to move on, let me know, but definitely forget about his stupid a$$.

[Tuxie]

Like I've said before, we don't know everything... but to me, it almost seems like he's just leading you on. Answer me this. What is his reasoning for breaking up (besides just 'needing space')? It sounds to me like he might be trying other avenues of relationships and when they don't work out, he comes cryin' back to you.

I'm a little leery of couples that think they need relationship counselling, just while they're dating. I'm like.... what's wrong with this picture?! I know a girl from work, her and her bf are having problems too. She mentioned that they were having problems... I jokingly mentioned that maybe they needed couselling. She told me they were thinking about it. :omfg:

The final call is yours... you hafta do what makes you happy. Getting torn up over a guy over and over doesn't sound like fun. Take care, let us know how it goes. Chin up!

btw... I love your screen name! LOL!! :D

[loverbabi132]

Sweetie, I went through the exact same thing. After i told him I wasn't going to do it anymore he wanted me back too. but i wasn't strong enough to say no. 2 weeks later i found out he cheated on me with one of my good friends. i'm not saying that is going to happen with you but it very well could. he just feels like he can control you now cuz he can make the rules. He can break up with you and you will still take him back. be strong don't let him do that to you. anybody who puts you through that much pain just isn't worth it.
I hope I helped ;)

[XxXMiss LovelyXxX]

Ok, well. When he says "he needs space" It kind of is a give away...Especially if he says it more then once!
I'm so sorry but...
He want's to be able to f*ck any girl he wants, without being acused of cheating.
Then he comes crawling back to you, expecting you to take him back?
Get over him, because he doesn't really love you. You can't wait for this guy forever. There is a guy out there who would give you the world. Just wait for him to come along. He will. :)

[demonica75]

the guy is a cold hearted jerk, you need to leave him before he messes with your feelings any more. he doesn't deserve you.

[penguin85]

Like I've said before, we don't know everything... but to me, it almost seems like he's just leading you on. Answer me this. What is his reasoning for breaking up (besides just 'needing space')? It sounds to me like he might be trying other avenues of relationships and when they don't work out, he comes cryin' back to you.

I'm a little leery of couples that think they need relationship counselling, just while they're dating. I'm like.... what's wrong with this picture?! I know a girl from work, her and her bf are having problems too. She mentioned that they were having problems... I jokingly mentioned that maybe they needed couselling. She told me they were thinking about it. :omfg:

The final call is yours... you hafta do what makes you happy. Getting torn up over a guy over and over doesn't sound like fun. Take care, let us know how it goes. Chin up!

btw... I love your screen name! LOL!! :D


thanks i love penguins......well besides the needing space excuse i should tell u the little fights we have are from me getting mad when i dont get what i want......i should have told u that be4! he gets frustrated when i fight with him about something so dumb.....from him not calling me to not hanging out when he says he will....i mean we only see each other like 2 maybe 3 times a week...and i have to say the only time we fight is on the phone,we dont really fight when we r 2gether....maybe once in the 5or6 hours we r 2gether! i dont know we really do love each other its just hard sometimes.....we both kinda know what r problem might be.....we r both scared of getting hurt cuz we were hurt in the past.....also my parents relationship isnt working and ive delt with them fighting for like 17 years now so how can i think i can make a relationship work...i know it sounds stupid but thats how i feel! hes scared cuz hes had his heart broken 2! maybe we dont need relationship counsling we need to go on our own!

[smackie9]

Yes! Good idea. Go your own separate ways! I hope you have learned something from this experience and don't get caught up in it again. Next time when some guy wants you back, keep your emotions in check before making a decision. Be more cautious!

[EC]

3 or 4 months with someone is hardly and remotely enough to get to know even half of what a person is like. If he needs space after 3 or 4 months of "dating" (Not relationship) then:

1) He is very honest about his feeling
2) He might be interested or seeing another person
3) The way you conduct yourself

Is he's a private kind of person but breaching his own space because he really love you?

Wanting to be together and with nobody else but not in a relationship, sounds like a relationship to me, exept that it gives the person that made the rules the Escape Route to exit at anytime they like saying you guys weren't in a relationship. I rather feel that this is very selfish, keep the other person on a leash while not having to give it a 100% percent.

This guy has some serious issues, not being able to make up his mind. We might still need some more information than "he needs space", he must have said other things about why needs the space, has he? I am curious, how old are both of you?

[penguin85]

3 or 4 months with someone is hardly and remotely enough to get to know even half of what a person is like. If he needs space after 3 or 4 months of "dating" (Not relationship) then:

1) He is very honest about his feeling
2) He might be interested or seeing another person
3) The way you conduct yourself

Is he's a private kind of person but breaching his own space because he really love you?

Wanting to be together and with nobody else but not in a relationship, sounds like a relationship to me, exept that it gives the person that made the rules the Escape Route to exit at anytime they like saying you guys weren't in a relationship. I rather feel that this is very selfish, keep the other person on a leash while not having to give it a 100% percent.

This guy has some serious issues, not being able to make up his mind. We might still need some more information than "he needs space", he must have said other things about why needs the space, has he? I am curious, how old are both of you?


ill be 22 in july and he'll be 24 in march....by the way its been some time since ive posted an update and we have been 2gether great 3monthes over our 1yearannv. we still have our little fights but what relationship doesnt...we will prolly be getting married in 3years maybe 2 not sure...but we r doing great.....im helping him get thru all the **** with tryin to get more time with his daughter and we couldnt be happier 2gether...if ne1 wants to still give some comments that would be great! thanks!